Friday, March 16, 2007

A little distraction......

Stumbled into bed
Tired to the bone
Unable to form any coherent thoughts
Barely able to take a shower
My head had barely touched the pillow
When sweet sleep took over

When did i wake up?
Why am i in the parking lot of my office?
Whose car is this i am in?

Oh i get it now
You're here

I am excited
How did you get here?
This is such a suprise
I thought you never wanted to be around me anymore
But that's stuff for later
Come here let me give you a huge hug
I have missed you you know?

Talking and laughing
Sitting in this strange car
That feels so familiar
Then you're kissing me
Passionately and possessively
And telling me you dont understand why it has been so long
What has kept us apart for so long?
Never again you say

I am stunned but ecstatic
Finally you stubborn soul
You finally get what everyone has known for so long
That we belong together

I feel intense joy
Feelings that words cannot begin to describe overwhelm me
But what i know for sure is that i am home
With you, in this unfamilar car that feels so familar

Then i am in darkness
Where did you go?
A dream
But such a vivid dream
I stretched my arm out in a futile search
Hoping my hand would hit the solid form of you
How could it have been a dream?
I am hit with a profound sense of loss and disappointment
How can it have been a dream?
It felt so right
So right
So right

Now i can only think of you
I imagine i hear your voice in the next room
I think i smell you
I cant think
Such a vivid dream
A dream that's making my reality so empty

*Had to interrrupt the series with this. Its been on my mind since i woke up today and i have so many words threatening to tumble out of me but there is no logic or sequence. The words are just hanging. Ever feel like just opening your mouth and letting words just pour out. Not to anyone in particular but just to let them out in the vain hope that once they are out, the thoughts and feelings behind them will be out as well?*

9 comments:

Noni Moss said...

Oh wow. I TOTALLY relate. I had a weird dream some time ago about this guy, who i'd been almost obsessed with at some point (total dickhead as it turns out) but my dream just ... I didn;t even know what to think or how to feel - it was completely totally unexpected and random.

Write. You dont have to post it up, just write and let it all out. Helps. Have a good day honey! (and weekend)

Soul said...

Damn Uzo...
Talk about getting all comfortable and nestled in fantasy and then woken up to reality.

It's like being stuck in a rut and not realising you are until something jars you awake.

I feel you, For a few months I've been having a conversation in my head.. words have been piling up that I feel unsure of how to use, it's like I feel the words are stuck in my chest, just piling up and making me swell..

I have to admit I am scared. scared that if and when I let them out, that's it. I will get over and leave the situation behind me.
The thing is .. I don't thnk I want to.

These words you wrote really got me. they seem to be speaking to me.
thank you.
and please keep writing.
You have amazing penmanship

Daddy's Girl said...

Wow... that's deep (and very well written, Uzo).
I can relate to Soul's words - knowing those words are stuck there, but I don't want to say them (almost CAN'T say them) because deep down I believe that's once it's said, it's over... and I don't want it to be over (I should, but I don't).
Have a great weekend Uzo.

LondonBuki said...

Where I am right now... I feel like this A LOT! It's not about a guy, it's just about so many things in my life. I have so much I want to say but don't know how to... I don't write private things, might try what Noni says.

Hope you are ok and I'm loving Blogger Bachelorette o!

Enjoy your weekend x

chika said...

i know that feeling and its alright to let it all out.

Bella Naija said...

Hmmmm
Dance Partner? No?
Anyway, I feel u...I can totally relate...I've been there!

Have a great weekend!

DiAmOnD hawk said...

wow...i believe that fantasy/dreams... can come true if you will it to be so...

so...who is it hmmmm???? this stubborn soul...??????????

Calabar Gal said...

Nice One. XXX

Adunni said...

Been there done, that have the t-shirt, so i can relate to this stuff. It may feel right in fantasy world but reality is hard and i guess we just have to learn to live with reality.