Thursday, November 30, 2006
I was told by a perfect stranger this morning, that i have a beautiful smile. Made my morning but has also set the tone for my song of the day:
Shanice - I love your smile
Remember this? Such a cute song. And the video was so clean and cute as well. Whatever happened to Shanice?
*If you would like this song, leave your email address in the comments section*
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
In line with the Nigerian federal government's renewed drive to encourage exports, a group of "experts" have come up with suggestions on how to improve the image of our local products by renaming them to conform to international standards on exports. Feel free to offer additional suggestions:
Kuli Kuli - Peanut Bars
Donkuwa/Robo Alata - Hot Charcolit Nuts
Kilishi - Beef Crackers
Dundun - Yamarita
Boli - Barbequed Plantain
Roasted Corn - Corn Aflame
Eko/Agidi - Corn Jello
Moin Moin - Bean Pie
Isi Ewu - Goat Hedo Lickins
Garri - Grain O Fibers
Bokoto/Nkwobi - Hoof Salad
Ogi/Akamu - Corn Caramel
Puff Puff - Energy Buns
Chin Chin - Dough Rocks
Zobo - Juice Rose Afrik
Kunnu - Grain Alive
Gurudi - Coconut Jaw Breakers
Bread & Akara - Bean Cake Burger
Ofada Rice - Unpolished rice for vegetarians
Adalu - Lentils & Grain Salad
Ikokore -Continental Yam Casserole
I love old music and i am especially impressed when modern artists can make a version of an old song i like. My song of the day was originally done by Stevie Wonder:
George Michael & Mary J Blige - As
Love, Love this song. Its a few years old now but it still makes me move. I like George Michael even though he has disappointed me lately but i think he's hot. That beard goatee thing he does is sooooo just hot.
The video for this song rocked as well. All shades of purple and multiple marys and georges. Lovely. Enjoy.
*If you would like this song, please leave an email address in the comments section*
Monday, November 27, 2006
On my father's side, i have lost both grandparents and i dont really know too much about them except for the fact that my grandfather was a proud man and my grandmother was absolutely besotted with her only child - My dad.
This post revolves around my mother's end of the family. My grandfather is a lawyer from Ondo State while my feisty grandmother is Ijesha.
Over the weekend, my grandmother paid us a visit specifically to see me. After her usual preamble, she made me sit in front of her and proceeded to tell me that her father (my great grand father) was a great, legendary drummer. His fame spread far and wide. She told me that the talking drum is a powerful powerful instrument. One that young people cannot appreciate.
This i believe - Has anyone seen Lagbaja perform live with his band? The man that plays the talking drum plays it perfectly. I saw them perform with Earl Klugh at the Muson Jazz festival and it was amazing. The bass guitarist would play a riff and the guy with the talking drum would reproduce the sound. On and on they went till my head felt light and i thought i would weep at the sheer beauty of the sounds surrounding me.
My grandmother proceeded to present me with a talking drum. The stick that came with the drum had its handle wrapped in Aso-Oke. Not the new stuff but the real old Aso-Oke. She said she thought i was old enough to understand what having the drum meant. That all of us "oyibo" children were forgetting things. That i should keep the drum and remember where she came from.
I felt so many things. Regret that i dont understand Yoruba or Igbo as well as i should. Regret that i have never taken the time to ask relevant questions from my grandparents. Pride in my family. For being a mish mash of flavors. A longing to share my history and heritage with everone.
I havent beaten the drum at all. I dont feel worthy. But i have wrapped the drum and stick in Aso-Oke that my grandmother gave me years ago and have placed it in a suitcase. When the time comes, i will unwrap it and let it take its place for display in my home.
I have never felt as much pride to be a Nigerian woman. So here's to our culture and heritage. In our bid to run from Nigeria and her issues,as we become more westernized, let us try not to forget where we come from and what we stand for. A people richer than our surroundings for we have what money cannot buy: Our Heritage.
Happy Monday! My song today is absolutely beautiful to me. Its on the Love & Basketball soundtrack and its by an artist that i appreciate:
Me'Shelle Ndegocello - You make a fool of me
I think this song is haunting. Its one of those songs that i think is pure. What i mean is its uncluttered with excessive musical instruments and equalizers. Its a simple but oh so complex song. The words are amazing and Me'shelle's delivery makes it extra special. She doesnt shout or adlib. She just sings this song and i feel her. I really feel the strength of emotions behind her words.
*If you would like this song, leave me your email address in the comments section*
Friday, November 24, 2006
So Uzo jumped to the rescue. Off i toddled next door anxious and hoping everything was perfect. We crowded around the suitcase and with bated breath, we unzipped. In the suitcase were 2 boxes. The first box had the "softer" items - the hoop skirt, gloves, purse and lingerie which we oohed at appropriately.
We proceeded to the main event. We opened the box and out came the accompanying shawl (so gorgeous), bolero jacket (to fulfill the church obligations - which was mighty gorgeous), the tiara (so regal), the veil and THE DRESS.
With a lot of care, we laid each item on the bed and she promptly started undressing. Obviously she wanted to try all her stuff on. Her mom was waiting in the living room, waiting to see the finished product.
So we started the process of getting her ready. We handled everything with care and with each item she put on, she seemed to glow a little bit more. We got her into the dress (which is a gorgeous strapless number that has optional caplet sleeves) and i laced her up and it was just perfect.
Time to get the veil on. Oh dear - my friend has braids in at the moment. So she asked me to put the tiara and veil on so she could get an idea of what it looked like on unbraided hair. No probs there. I put the tiara on and stuck the veil in and i immediately developed goosebumps. She helped me put the blusher over my face and i almost passed out.
Let me tell you that this is some pretty intense stuff. Do not joke around with wedding accessories. The feeling that hit me in my gut was indescribable. I looked at myself in the mirror and i looked ethereal and beautiful. Its a good thing i am single at the moment because, i would have picked the phone up and proposed to someone right there and then. What in the world. Anyway, we walked out to her living room and her mom cried some and oohed and aahed and we went back to start the undressing process. I helped her get out of her stuff and we packed everything away. And the veil and tiara were the last to come off.
I am back to "normal" today but i just thought it was sooo interesting the feelings i experienced with just a veil and tiara on my head. Imagine how i would feel if i was ACTUALLY getting married to the man meant for me, that makes me obscenely happy. Good grief....
*I missed my women's issue post today because i forgot to save what i was working on, so i will have that posted come Monday. Have a great weekend everyone. Ooh and on the Nigerian entertainment scene, LL Cool J and Akon will be in Nigeria for the Star Mega Jam in a few weeks*
A few random weird things about me:
* I eat paper: Not like a meal or anything. LOL. But i tear the corners of books and eat. I dont know why or how it started but i do it. If you take any book i have and flip through, you will see the eaten edges. I remember being younger and eating corners of my boyfriend's books and i would actually sign it - Uzo was here.
* I use my perfumes and fragrances in order: I have them arranged and i use them one after the other. If someone messes with the order, i cry. If i miss a day, i cry. If anything happens to mess with that balance, i cry.
* I dont like watermelons or pawpaws: Not just the taste but i cant touch these fruits. The seeds freak me out and i break out in goosebumps if i see the fruit cut open. Especially a pawpaw. Oh yuck!
* I screech and grunt when i laugh: Its very unladylike and uncool but when i am really tickled, the sounds that come out of me have raised eyebrows. So i try to be aware when i laugh.
* I am scared of little people: I know its not right but i really am. I see them on the street and i want to run away. I see them on TV and i turn away. Its not a distaste thing. Its real fear. I dont know why.
On that note, i will stop in order to retain some dignity. There are a few other things that are ABSOLUTE SECRETS...LOL
I tag Soul, Diamond, Olawunmi, London Buki in particular and everyone else that has the time to do this.....
Its friday and i am exhausted. I have been so busy and then with the change of weather in Lagos meaning all the dust in the air, i came down with something. But i am glad the weekend is here and my song today is one of my favorites right now from an enduring artist that i love:
Lionel Richie - They call it love
Lionel Richie started out with The Commodores and belted out such classics as "Nightshift" and "Brickhouse". He veered off on his own and has single handedly in my mind become the ballad crooner. From "Easy", "Penny Lover" to "Endless Love".
This man with the curly hair has managed to remain relevant in every decade. In the 90's he hit us with "Do it to me" and "My Destiny". In recent years, some of my favorites include "Ball and Chain" and "To Love a woman".
He has had duets with everyone from Diana Ross, Enrique Iglesias, Lemar to Lenny Kravitz.
This song is from his latest effort - Coming Home and i love love it. I have been trying to embed the song onto my blog but blogger is acting up but i will keep trying through out the day.
Whenever i hear a Lionel Richie song especially his ballads, i just want to be in love. Some of the lyrics from this song are:
It's so clear for you to see (dont let anybody tell you what to do)
Why they can't they just let us be happy (i dont want to find somebody new)
If you know whats real in your heart
Then dont let them tear us apart (Cuz you feel it, I feel it, Lets think this through)
Yes Lionel, i feel it.
*If you would like this song, leave me your email address in the comments section*
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
At about 5pm yesterday, the office assistant IK, started the process of closing up for the day. I noticed him beginning to primp from the corner of my eye.
He took his shoes off and buffed them with a cloth that emerged from his back pocket. He brought out a pocket mirror and placed it on the table. He tucked his shirt in properly. Brought out some lotion which he applied to his hands. He took a comb out and combed his hair in a forward motion. And then, he brought out a bottle of powder. In a white bottle with flowers on it. The bottle was labeled "Enchanted Rose". He poured a little of this WHITE powder into his palm. The room was immediately pervaded with a heavy scent of flowers. A sickening sweet scent. He dusted the excess powder off and applied this to his face. He picked up the mirror and rubbed the powder in properly. Applied vaseline to his lips. Got up and turned to me and said: "Goodnight Aunty Uzo". Then he left.
I looked around and i noticed someone else at work watching his retreating back in disbelief. We made eye contact and began to laugh out loud. Oh my goodness.
There are no words! I was soooo amused. Thanks IK for making me really laugh....
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Everybody scream Alleluia this morning! Oh my song of the day is one of my favorite gospel songs of all time:
Israel & New Breed - All Around
I woke up early this morning. Feeling great. Got to work and i am filled with energy and ready to rock and roll. I have an all day workshop that i will be anchoring but i am not fazed. Its all peaches and cream in my world today so i thank God.
This song says it all "All around, all around. Everywhere i look your love is all around"
Have a blessed day!
*If you would like this song, leave your email address in the comments section*
Monday, November 20, 2006
I have my thoughts but answer me this....
Old school day today:
Kenny Thomas - Thinking about your love
"Thinking about your love. Tonight. Today and always".
This is another one of those songs that i loved for the longest time but i had no idea who it was by. A birthday party staple from back in the day. So now i know its by Kenny Thomas. Who the hell is that?
Anyway, hoping this chases away the monday blues. If you are like me and hate mondays, enjoy. Its definitely helping me out today.
*Let me know if you would like this song*
I had a full weekend and a really fun one too:
Friday Night: I stopped by at a friend's place after work. After a long trip to India, i got - you guessed it, a few indian movies. Then it was off to my house to prepare for my movie night i had planned. I had 2 girls come over and we watched Sex and the City, Prison Break, Pretty Woman and Under the Tuscan Sun. Chick flick night. So fun.
Saturday: I woke up to get to the gym. I didnt overdo it this week. Managed to get an hour and a half in and a lot of grunting towards the end when i did lunges and abs (the part i hate the most). Once again, the thought crossed my mind, why do these men come into the gym in packs and pnly workout their upper bodies? Toothpick legs and huge upper bodies. So wrong. I went home, took a shower and took off to the salon to get my hair and nails done. I took that step. I cut my hair. My hair has gone from past my shoulders to chin length and i am loving it. Rushed back home to get all dolled up and it was off to a wedding reception where get this: I had to wear a hat. LOL. Me, a hat with feathers and everything.
I fulfilled my obligations and staggered back home exhausted.
Sunday: Had to wake up and get ready to catch a movie at noon with a blogger: Daddy's Girl.
We had plans to see Don - an indian movie and i managed to drag an old friend along as well. We had fun. The movie was sooo great and we all loved it. Its interesting putting a face to the words. She is soooooo sweet. And beautiul and mega quiet. LOL. We are already making plans to see another movie. After the movie, my friend and I had lunch at this lovely italian restaurant called Al Dente. We talked and laughed and then it was back home to hangout with my parents and laugh loads.
It was the perfect weekend: movies, friends, laughter......Hope you all had a good weekend as well.....
Friday, November 17, 2006
I am sitting here at my desk doing my work gently, when i look at the time. Ah. Noon. Time to break out my salad. Since i broke down and confessed to the world about my weight issues, you can understand that i am practicing portion control. I dont eat breakfast just because i feel nauseous in the mornings. I had some fruit earlier on but i was ready to dig into my salad for some energy.
I woke up this morning at 6am to make this salad. Some cabbage, lettuce, green peppers, carrots, sweetcorn, some olives topped with some tuna. Mixed my own dressing with olive oil, lemon juce and some black pepper. Do you know what it means to scrape carrots and chop all these veggies at 6am, put it in a bowl and come to work?
Anyway, i bring out my LITTLE bowl with my salad and prepare to silence the hunger pangs when a co-worker walks by my desk and says: "Hmm this oyibo girl. What is this ya eating again". I say some salad. Out of COURTESY, i say "care to join me?".
You all know that i just asked just because. This rude mannerless man said "IK (the office assistant) bring me a fork". Ehn? Is this man for real? He has got to be f*****g kidding me.
He takes the fork, pulls up a chair and digs in. Ehn? His first mouthful "what kind of salad is this one?" Second mouthful "no salad cream in this thing oh" Third mouthful "you should have boiled egg and put it on top" Fourth mouthful "i hope you dont mind oh" Fifth mouthful "ah ah. This thing is sweet oh. Can you make for me next time"
Let me reiterate : I am eating smaller portions through out the day, so this salad was 7 mouthfuls at the most.
He removed his fork leaving like 3 grains of sweetcorn, some strips of carrot and one olive or so. I called him back and said "you can finish it all". He said "Are you sure?". I said "Oh yes". He took my bowl and just went away.
I heard him calling the office assistant to come and take my bowl away.
Can you imagine this useless man? Now i am hungry and he has eaten ALL my salad that i lovingly made for myself. Useless, greedy, mannerless agbaya of a man
Urinary incontinence is classified as the involuntary loss of urine. It has been estimated that it affects as many as 13 million Americans and that 10 to 30% of all US women aged 15 to 64 and 50% of all female nursing home patients are affected with the condition.
Around the globe, urinary incontinence is widespread. In Asian nations, between 4% (China) and 17% (Singapore) of all women are affected. Between 15 and 34% of all European women experience some form of urinary incontinence. The overall average worldwide rate of urinary incontinence for men and women is greater than 25% and is approximately 15% for all women world wide. The prevalence of urinary incontinence tends to be higher in women than in men due to anatomical differences as well as the fact that women experience pelvic trauma during childbirth. The number of women with urinary incontinence of any type increases with age. Younger age group cohorts tend to reflect a lower percentage while post menopausal women tend to yield a higher percentage.
In order to understand urinary incontinence, one must understand the anatomy and physiology of the urogenital system. Normal bladder control is maintained by the bladder and urinary sphincter as they work together as a valve. The urethra and urinary sphincter muscle relax and open, the bladder opens, and urine passes. The bladder neck and urethra are under muscular control with the lower portion of the sphincter tightening to maintain continence. When surrounding tissue is compromised or weakened, there is lack of bladder neck support and incontinence is the result.
The primary causes of urinary incontinence are:
Bladder related: caused by the bladder's failure to store, failure to empty, or both; reduced capacity, involuntary contractions, poor bladder compliance.
Sphincter related: poor positioning of the bladder neck in women, uncoordinated bladder sphincter action, sphincter damage or weakness, outlet obstruction.
There are three major types of incontinence which are based on the characteristics of the disorder:
Stress: caused by weak external sphincter and pelvic floor muscles and an unsupported bladder neck.
Urge: causes may be neurological in origin; bladder is overly sensitive and may contract unexpectedly.
Overflow: continual leakage from an overly full bladder that never empties completely.
Pharmacologic therapy is generally used in the treatment of urge incontinence due to the fact that the underlying causes of urge incontinence are primarily related to neuromuscular dysfunction. These drugs, while effective, produce a variety of untoward side effects of varying degrees. Stress incontinence is typically treated surgically, however anticholinergics found in common decongestants seem to be effective in patients with poor muscle tone and poorly functioning sphincters.
As many as 50% of women in the United States have asked their physicians about breast pain, also known as mastalgia or fibrocystic breast disease. Women often find they have symptoms of swelling, breast pain, tenderness and lumps that increase in their breasts immediately prior and during their menses. This clustering of symptoms is called cyclical mastalgia. Symptoms can last up to seven days or more but frequently last one to four days.
For about 15% of the women who do experience breast pain, the pain warrants the women take prescription medication for their pain. Most women who do consult their physician regarding breast pain do not have breast cancer. If you are concerned about breast pain, it is very important to consult your physician about the symptoms you are experiencing. Mastalgia can impair a woman’s ability to work, participate in her daily activities, embrace a child or have an intimate relationship with her partner. In addition, mastalgia frequently causes increased anxiety and stress in a woman’s life as a result of dealing with pain each month. Additional psychological stress is often caused by the mammograms, ultrasound scans and breast biopsies, utilized by physicians to rule out other diseases of the breast.
Current treatments for mastalgia include one FDA approved prescription medication for mastalgia which typically causes unwanted side effects like facial hair growth, weight gain and acne; dietary changes and vitamin supplements; and purchasing a properly fitting brassiere.
Dysmenorrhea is the term used to describe the pain and cramping associated with menstruation. It is estimated that dysmenorrhea is the most common gynecological condition affecting women and can occur in the absence or presence of other conditions (like endometriosis).
Primary dysmenorrhea is menstrual pain that is not related to any other condition. Dysmenorrhea can start shortly after a woman’s first menstrual period and last through menopause. Estimates indicate 50% of all women worldwide experience primary dysmenorrhea and some prevalence rates indicate that as many as 90% of all women experience dysmenorrhea at some time in their lives.
In the United States, it has been estimated that 100 million work hours are lost per year due to dysmenorrhea which could translate into $2 billion in lost work productivity. More than half of all women who experience primary dysmenorrhea indicate that their pain is moderate to severe in nature. Multiple treatments have been used throughout recent history to ameliorate dysmenorrhea including herbal supplements, aspirin, non-steroidal anti-inflammatory agents, prescription pain medications and oral contraceptives.
Finally have a chance to breathe. One of my favorite bloggers: Soul has been paying tribute to some of my favorite artists. No contemporary stuff here. I am talking about the true greats: Miriam Makeba, Ella Fitzgerald, Nina Simone, Cassandra Wilson and today, Billie Holliday. True music.
My song of the day is one of my favorite songs ever:
Nina Simone - Mr Bojangles
Check out Soul's blog for more on the incomparable Ms Simone (this would be the point when hyperlinks would be great. But i cant figure it out with blogger...Hint). So listen and enjoy some REAL music.
*Let me know if you would like this song*
Thursday, November 16, 2006
I will say this now: A declaration - I love Memes. I am a Meme whore. I found this one on Overwhelmed Naija Babe's blog and i have taken it upon myself to do it. In a round about way she tagged me...LOL. So here goes (i am clapping my hands in delight):
Whats your name spelt backwards?: Atuma Aloniraa Elnalob Amoza ( a lot of As in my name)
What did you do last night?: Watched some episodes of Friends (season 6), wrote in my journal, chatted with my mom and went to bed
The last thing you downloaded onto your computer?: Lettre A La Maison Blanche - Corneille
Have you ever licked a 9 volt battery?: I think so (maybe its a manufactured memory..LOL. I think its tasted metallic)
Last time you swam in a pool?: I cant swim. But i dangled my feet in a pool about 5 months ago
What are you wearing?: Black pants, black lacy camisole, red checked wrap shirt, black BCBG pumps with criss cross straps .....Hmm love black
How many cars have you owned?: 2
Type of music you dislike most?: Heavy metal. Can only take this in very small doses. Gives me a headache.
Are you registered to vote?: No (LOL)
Do you have cable?: Yes
What kind of computer do you use?: Toshiba Laptop
Ever made a prank phone call?: Yes. Several
You like anyone right now?: Yes. Really, really, really.
Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?: Been bungee jumping. Will NEVER do it again. Not sure i want to go sky diving though.
Furthest place you ever traveled?: Dubai (well its in the Middle East but its not the farthest in terms of flight time)
What's your favorite comic strip?: Book: Archie comics, Tintin & Asterix (oh the memories)
Do u know all the words to the national anthem?: The Nigerian and US anthems
Shower, morning or night?: Both
Best movie you've seen in the past month?: Ehm. I havent actually seen anything worth remembering as i have been overloading on TV shows. But i anticipate that the Bollywood movie - Don that i will be seeing this weeekend with a fellow blogger (Daddy's Girl) will be it.
Favorite pizza toppings?: I dont like Pizza. But there is a chain in some states of the Us - California Pizza Kitchen that makes pretty interesting ones. My favorite from there is Pear and Gorgonzola Cheese - its also got caramelized onions and walnuts. Yummy
Chips or popcorn?: Sweet Popcorn
What cell phone provider do you have?: MTN
Have you ever smoked peanut shells?: Huh?
Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?: I have been in fashion shows though. Does that count?
Orange Juice or apple?: Apple
Who were the last people you sat at lunch with?: Some work people
Favorite chocolate bar?: I am not really a chocolate person. I love those selection boxes though that come with those little ones. I actually love the cute boxes and the presentation of them a little more than the candy. LOL
Who is your longest friend and how long?: Hmm ...Yuddie (about 11 years), Osa (about 11years) and O (about 13 years???/)
Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?: I hate raw tomatos. I can only handle them in sauces and stews
Have you ever won a trophy?: LOL. I won something for beautiful smile, Miss Smile, Most likely to end up in entertainment (look what i do now), Miss Fine and i even won something last year at my office christmas party. LOL
Favorite arcade game?: Not a big fan of arcade games
Ever ordered from an infomercial?: Oh yes. LOL. Especially kitchen gadgets. Those demonstrations are incredible. Silly money takers.
Sprite or 7-UP?: 7Up. More zesty
Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school/work?: Yes. In secondary school. There is a dress code at work ...The joys of being a consultant. LOL
Last thing you bought at Walgreens?: I have never been to Walgreens. Always seemed tacky and just scattered. LOL
Ever thrown up in public?: No
Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?: Definitely finding true love. I am a sucker for love and a hopeless romantic.
Do you believe in love at first sight?: No. LOL. I believe in connections at first sight though.
SPONGEBOB OR JIMMY NEUTRON?: The Lion King all the way
Did you have long hair as a young kid?: Oh yes. Complete with excessive hair baubles and ribbons. LOL.
What message is on your voicemail machine?: Nada
Where would you like to go right now?: India (no suprises there) and The Seychelles.
What’s the name of your pet?: LOL. Nothing
What kind of back pack do you have, and what's in it?: Backpack? LOL. More like huge bag.
What do you think about most?: LOL. Wow....Just stuff.
I tag everyone that has the time to do this. LOL
So to keep me sane today, i look to one of my favorite groups (i believe Soul has a thing for them too):
Cameo - Word Up!
What can i say about this. Its hot and sexy and had an interesting video.
I wish i could be more eloquent, but my mind is focused on marketing plans, rollout frameworks, launches, IBM servers, competitors and a massive meeting that i have in 20 minutes where i will be making a presentation that includes telling the promoters of this project some home truths guaranteed to get them all riled up. So wish me luck!
I think after this, i might be able to post something relaxing....
*Let me know if you would like this song*
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Okay. I need some help with my song of the day:
Hanson - Mmmbop
I like this song - dont get me wrong. And it brings back memories of college. I thought the Hanson boys were so adorable especially Zack. But what is this song about? I have really tried to figure it out but i just dont get it. it does have a pretty catch chorous...mmmbop
After my "down" day yesterday and also as a tribute to the chocolate teddy bear - Mr Gerald Levert, my song today is up tempo and old school:
LeVert - Casanova
Oh boy! Remember this one. In the video, the guys were wearing these really colorful blazers and the hair cuts? Priceless. I also remember this song being a staple at birthday parties. Oh the memories.
*Let me know if would like this song*
Monday, November 13, 2006
I opted instead to do an hour of step aerobics, 3o minutes on the treadmill, 30 minutes on the elliptical machine, 30 minutes on the bike and 45 minutes of weights.
I was fine driving home. I was fine taking a shower and getting into bed for a quick nap. The trouble started when i woke up to get ready to head to the Island to see Amazing Grace. I stepped off the bed and nearly died. Pain. Pain. Pain. I simply laid on the floor, pulled a pillow from my bed and slept where i was. My dad came in to ask why i was still home and seemed alarmed that i was sleeping on the carpet. I told him i was fine but tired. Since i think my folks are used to my bouts of odd behavior, he let me be.
My friend called me at about 5pm to remind me to get ready to see Umoja. I managed to get up and crawl into the shower. I sat in my shower and let the water just drench me. I could not move. I wanted to stay home in one position but the tickets had been paid for and i really wanted to see the show. My sassy ensemble was scrapped for a very loose tunic with drawstring pants and flat slippers. Believe me, the thought of being constrained in any way was not to be considered.
Through out the show, i just stared. I enjoyed it, i just couldnt show my appreciation. I got back home, took a shower and many painkillers and knocked myself out.
Sunday morning, my mom came into my room and i couldnt move. I just started to cry. "Everything hurts. I cant move, i cant breathe, i cant swallow and my eyelashes hurt". This is not an exaggeration. I cried because i REALLY COULD NOT TAKE A BREATH. My mom had to get some Deep Heat and rub my joints. I am talking about ankles, knees, legs, hands, back, neck. My face was the only part of my body that was left alone and i would have rubbed that stuff all over my face if my mom hadnt stop me. Even crying was painful.
In my grand scheme, i was going to hit the gym on sunday and work out some more but it was not going to happen. So here i am on monday morning. I can manage and i fully intend to get to the gym tonight but i have to ask: Why do i do this to myself?
People ask me what my love affair with Betty Boop is and part of it has to do with how she looks. She has an exaggerated figure sure, but she is not the conventional barbie doll or cartoon character and i love how sexy and confident she is in all her revealing outfits. She just doesnt seem to have any self esteem issues..LOL. I know - pretty deep thoughts regarding strokes of a pencil right?
I have been battling with my weight all my life. I have always been chubby and cute and i know in my heart of hearts that i will never be a size 6. I am just not built that way. However, a few years ago, a pretty traumatic period in my life led to 50 pounds of weight gain and a brutalized ego, self esteem that sunk through the ground and a new perception of me. I battle with all this every day. On some days, i am divalicious and vain to the core. But i will admit that most days is a battle. Days when i dont eat anything at all except fruit and lots of herbal teas. Days when i eat too much usually tied to feeling bad. Days when i brutalize myself at the gym. Days when i get up mid nap to run on the spot for 30 minutes just because i think my toes are chubby.
At times, i think i might have serious issues but at other times, i think its all my vanity. I acknowledge that i have a control thing. Everything in my life is going great and i seem to be able to control my career progression, my money etc but i cannot control my weight and that bugs the crap out of me. I look at friends that eat everything in sight except fruit, salads and water while i have to watch everything i eat and it hurts me so much. I get the "You are so beautiful but ehm you could be a little smaller"...on and on it goes.
I am of 2 minds....A part of me knows what i am - smart, accomplished, not bad looking, eloquent but the other part of me just screams fat, chubby, fat, fat, fat. Some days, i dress up and people say "you look so nice", i hear"fat, fat, fat". Its insane. At the gym, i stepped on the scale and saw a 2kg weight loss. Did i celebrate? Nope, my mind said "only 2kg? That's nothing".
I have never ever tried to express what i feel about this...this is my first time and i have absolutely no idea why these words that are flowing through my fingers today are coming from. Maybe i am just tired of being funny, smart and so damn perfect all the time. This is one of my demons that haunts me every single day and to deny its existence and pretend that everything is sooo damn dandy is exhausting.
So i will go to the gym tonight as planned. Its 11.44am and i have had my fruit and my 4th cup of pineapple & grapefruit green tea. Its a struggle and its hard but dammit, i have to find some way to deal with this. I have to come to terms with who i am. I know that i will be battling this weight thing for the rest of my life - the women in my family have shown me that but there has to be a way that i can see myself as Uzo with all my virtues not Fat Uzo. A way to practice what i preach and realize how wonderful i am.....
I was made to love you
My hands to touch you
My arms to hold you
My legs to stand
My time to spend with you forever
I was made to love you
My lips to kiss you
My eyes to see you
My legs to stand
My time to spend
With you forever and ever
I remember our first date, our first argument
Our very first break up to make up that got us to this moment
And every girlfriend and every one night stand
Every heartbreak, every heartache led me to you
Drove me to you, made me better, better suited for you
It had to be my destiny
Sunday, November 12, 2006
My song for today is one of his lesser known tracks which i enjoy - it amuses me as well:
Gerald Levert - Application
I will say that Gerald Levert retained true R&B in every cd. He sang with soul and his voice was just sooo deep. Rest in peace Gerald....
*Let me know if you would like this song*
(CNN) -- Gerald Levert, the R&B singer whose hits included "I Swear" and "I'd Give Anything," as well as chart-toppers with the groups LeVert and LSG, has died, according to his label, Atlantic Records. He was 40. Levert died of a heart attack Friday at his Cleveland, Ohio, home, according a statement from Atlantic.
"He was one of the greatest voices of our time, who sang with unmatched soulfulness and power, as well as a tremendously gifted composer and an accomplished producer," the statement read. "Above all, he was an exceptional human being whose warmth and grace inspired us all."
Levert, the son of O'Jays member Eddie Levert Sr., first hit it big with his sibling Sean and friend Marc Gordon as the trio LeVert in the mid-'80s. The group's hits included the 1987 song "Casanova," which hit the Top Five on the pop charts.
Gerald Levert went solo in 1991. His hits included a duet with his father, "Baby Hold On to Me."
In 1997 he and singers Johnny Gill and Keith Sweat formed LSG. The group's self-titled album sold more than two million copies, and their hits included "My Body."
More recent albums by Levert included 2002's "The G Spot" and 2004's "Do I Speak for the World."
His most recent album was 2005's "Voices."
Levert had four children.
Friday, November 10, 2006
The elders stepped in to review the case because local police had failed to arrest the accused man after a complaint was filed by the victim's husband, village head Badr-ul Hasan told The Associated Press.
"Police told us that since the woman is deaf and mute, she is not able to narrate the incident," Hasan said. A village court made up of five elders heard from both sides on Wednesday. It found the man guilty, fined him 5,000 rupees (US$110, euro90), and ordered he be publicly slapped with an open hand 51 times, he said.
"We can't do more than that. The village court doesn't have powers to arrest anyone," said Hasan. " By public slapping, the court wants to put (him) to shame."
Communicating through hand signals, the woman, a mother of three, said she was raped in a field last Sunday when returning home from work in Rampur, 330 kilometers (205 miles) northwest of Lucknow, the state capital of Uttar Pradesh.
Village courts generally settle land disputes and other disagreements among residents, not criminal offenses. But many rape cases go unreported in India, especially in villages, since women fear further harassment by police, who often work with corrupt local politicians and landlords.
Police inspector C.N. Singh said officers were still investigating her complaint. "A case will be registered only if police find proof that the woman was raped. We are inquiring from children who were playing in the field then," Singh said.
If convicted by a state criminal court, the man could be sentenced to death.
"Bangladesh Human Rights Commission is a voluntary Organisation. It was established in the year 1987. It is an affiliated member of OMCT, International Commission of Jurists, and International Association of American Minorities. It also has accredited status with the UNO. BHRC is the largest Human Rights Organization in Bangladesh. It deals with various activities to up keep Human Rights situation.Followings are some of many: Legal Aid Programme for victims of Torture; Medical Aid Programme for victims of Torture; Legal Literary and Publication Programme; Investigation & fact finding Programme; Protecting minorities and Tribal Rights Programme; Research Programme; Urgent Action Programme; Legal Training Programme; Election Monitoring Programme; Disaster Management Programme.
I shall restrict myself to the violation of Human Rights against women, the type of torture they suffer, the legal framework in the country & the activities of BHRC to help them in the relevant fields.Bangladesh is a Country with a population of about 140 million. The per capita income is about 363 Dollars. But more than 50% people live below poverty line.The women are considered 2nd class citizens. Though various laws and Acts have been made to protect them, they are easy prey to persecution, torture and injustice.The injustice is imposed socially and by religion.
Type of torture:
Women fall prey to Acid Burn, inflicted upon them by male perpetrators. Usually the criminals do this after being refused to have sexual relations or proposal of marriage. Sometimes the cause is for acquiring her property or dowry from her parents.
Women are sometimes burnt to death by the husband or his family for the sake of dowry. Usually dowry is taken during the marriage. But the greedy family puts pressure on the family of the girl for further dowry and in case of failure, resort to such barbaric activities. Sometimes, in order to get rid of torture, the women commit suicide.
The birth of a female child is rarely considered a happy incident. If a woman cannot have a male child, usually the husband remarries.The female child is also given less priority. They are given less love and affection by the family and the relatives.Female child is usually offered less nutritious food, less money is spent on their education. They are more abused and rebuked. They have to do large part of the household work.
Discrimination by Religion:
The Hindu women cannot inherit father's property.
The Daughter inherits ½ that of the brother by Muslim Family Law. If a person dies without leaving a male child, ½ his / her property goes to his / her brother and the daughter only inherits ½ of his / her property but incase only a male child is heir he inherits all of the property.
In the eyes of "Shariat Law" a woman is considered ½ that of a man. In "Shariat Law" 4 witnesses are always necessary. But in case women are witnesses double number is necessary. Again if only women are witnesses, the case is disregarded.
Thus we see that the women are victims of social & religious injustice. They are brought up in an environment of unfriendliness. Then again, the women fall prey to kidnapping. They are kidnapped and sold to different brothels. They are also trafficked illegally to other country like India, Pakistan and Middle East. Several type of such trafficking is there.
Sometimes some male perpetrator get married to woman and take them out of the village, (Parents' home) and bring her to the town. There he engages her and forces her to do immoral activities. Sometimes she is sold to brothels or other countries.
Female children are kidnapped and are forced to do immoral act or are sold out.
Sometimes the female village teenaged girls or middle-aged women are lured to get jobs in the cities. They believe and come to the cities only to find that they have been brought to work as prostitutes or sold to foreign countries. Sometimes they are sent to the foreign country as Garments labour or other office-worker. But after reaching the country they find that they have to work as housemaids or prostitutes.
Mr. Chairman, Bangladesh has a well-developed set of National laws. In addition to its Penal code, Bangladesh has passed some other laws to address specific needs of women in the country. So far the willingness of the Government and also the opinion of the members of the legislature is concerned, the women are well cared for and actions are " Meant " to be taken to reduce cruelty to women. But in reality everything is meaningless. The following is a narration of the reason.
The legal procedure in Bangladesh is very lengthy. At first a crime is to be reported to the local police station. About 95% police officers are thoroughly corrupt. The women usually cannot pay any bribe. And actually they are the victims so question of paying bribe does not arise at all.But they have to make the local police officers " HAPPY " in order to file the complain and get a well documented " Charge Sheet " written. Usually the offender is more powerful. They make the police officer " HAPPY " and gets a " Charge Sheet " which is so inaccurate, vague and under rated that it does not stand when put up in the court. Again after a sentence is passed in the lower court it goes to the session, Judge court and then to the high court and ultimately to the Supreme Court. The process takes in excess of 2 to 3 years at the least. 90% women or their families can not bear the cost of the lengthy legal procedure. The perpetrators usually remain at large on bail & persecute the victims and their family to withdraw the case. Sometimes they burn their houses or even kill or injure other members of the family. Till now we have more than 1000 acid victims cases and only in 13 cases sentences have been passed. These too are in the lower courts only. So where comes the justice ? How can we prevent cruelty to the women? Should we wait for the perpetrators to throw acids on women and we shall treat them only? No!! The perpetrators must be brought to justice so that the crime in itself is lowered and we have less case to deal with. As if all these are not enough, It is a shameful thing to say that even many judicial members are corrupt and sometimes the judgement can be bought. So in order to prevent the women from suffering and falling prey to the Acid Burn, the legal procedure must be effective.
BHRC proposed to the Government to set up Special Tribunals which may be headed by a judge of the High Court and the Judgement passed may only be appealed to the Supreme Court. If such Tribunals are made the criminals can be brought to justice. BHRC appeals to the International Community to put all its power to persuade the Government of Bangladesh to take up effective measures to give justice to the suffering thousands. Hundreds of young women in Bangladesh are being attacked with Acids. At least 20 cases of Acid Burn occur every month & the victims are almost always women & children. Sulfuric acid is the commonest acid used. It melts away skin & muscle; often to the bone. Steps are being taken to restrict the selling of acid but it is virtually impossible, as it is a common requirement in the Battery repair shop and Tannery industries. Acid throwing increased about 7 years ago and coincided with a new thrust by women in Bangladesh to assert their rights. With the help of the "Micro-Credit" programme started by various NGO's there have been uplifts in the condition of the women. They have grown self honour and independence and refuse to be a commodity in the hand of the father or the husband.
It may be reasoned that Acid throwing is a tragic by product of a gender revolution. Again, 80% of the female if arrested by the police for various reasons, fall prey to the carnal desire of the Police officers. Last year 16 such cases were reported. Bangladesh Human Rights Commission has taken up the matter of Acid Burn very seriously. In case of Acid Burn victims, as soon as a case is reported, the local members of the organisation goes to the family of the victim. They give them psychological support, take up the matter to the police, provide initial medical treatment by the local doctors & ultimately bring the victim to Dhaka. The Organisation has a hospital there in Dhaka where the victim is treated by Surgeons, Plastic Surgeons, Ophthalmologist & other relevant specialists. BHRC does the necessary follow up with the local police station. The police officers are deterred to the recourse of corruption. Presently BHRC is giving legal assistance to about 200 Acid Burn cases and is giving medical aid to about 60 victims.
BHRC has involved itself in giving legal assistance to all the atrocities caused against women while in police custody. BHRC also gives legal assistance to the women who became victims if torture by their husband. BHRC has given legal aid to some women who were trafficked out of the country. About 123 women were found in India who were brought back to Bangladesh. About 6000 women were trafficked out of border every year. The task of recovering them, bringing them home and rehabilitate them is a mammoth task. All conscious people of the world must work side by side to help out these poor victims. As per article 28 of our constitution, it is obligatory for the state to make provisions for betterment of the women and children and the neglected section of the society. Under Article 25 (6), Universal Declaration of Human Rights, every child is entitled to special care, treatment, social security whether born of wed lock or not.
Again under UN convection on the Rights of children, the state is responsible for sound upbringing of children. The convention enjoins principally the ways that adults and governments must adopt to protect the children, support their health, education and development. It also includes the right to have home, food and also right to protection from abuse and neglect. But in our country the girl child remains neglected, undesired in the family and unwanted in the society. Once upon a time the girl child was buried alive. The lives of many female children are shattered by extreme poverty and discrimination in terms of facilities and social protection. We have no birth registration system. As a result a large number of female children, teen-aged girls, women are trafficked within the territory and out of border. The same reason complicate their rescue, release and repatriation. And even after their rescue and repatriation, their reintegration in the society and family is for more difficult due to social taboos and brutal customs.
Prostitution is an immoral act. It is very degrading. The extent of suffering can only be understood by the victim. More than 25% girls working in different brothels are under the age of 18 years. 95% of those girls are trafficked under the age of 18 and about 25% are under the age of 12. In the World Summit for children in 1990, governments pledged to give every child a better life and promising future. They signed the World Declaration on the survival, protection and development of children and a plan of Action for implementing the World Declaration.
As BHRC is a powerful organisation with powerful men in it, the perpetrators of crimes against women are more aware and careful than before. They know that there will be BHRC against any victim and thus the victims are now-a-days not an easy prey. As I told you before, this sort of crime is usually committed against the poor as they have limited resources to fight back, with the help of BHRC, now-a-days the victims are no more women of the poor sect. BHRC never let go a crime unchallenged. If the legal proceedings would have been shortened and the criminals were duly punished, the incidence of this and other barbarian crimes committed against women, would be greatly reduced.People form all walks of life must come forward to help fulfill the World Declaration. Only observance of World Children Day etc. will not solve the problem but the all out effort of the Government and people and the help of the Developed Countries will ensure the well-being of the destitute children of LDCs.
I, on behalf of Bangladesh Human Rights Commission like to implore upon the International Community to come forward & strengthen the hands of BHRC with the help of other Human Rights Activities, in home and aboard, we are positive that good result will definitely be obtained.
Ladies and gentlemen, I take the pleasure to thank Mr. Saiful Islam Dildar, Secretary General, BHRC to give me a chance to present the woeful condition of the women in my country. And thank you all present here for giving a patient hearing.
Please excuse me if I have become emotional or rhetorical."
I just finished my first Silhouette romance novel in 2 years. And i am on a quest to get some more. All the love and romance has dictated my song of the day:
George Benson & Roberta Flack - You are the love of my life
Music of yester years has sooo much more meaning that bumping and grinding lyrics of today. With very few exceptions, the music today is only to be taken at surface value. Nothing to get me thinking. But when i turn on the music from the Motown era, some jazz artists, good old Boyz II Men etc, i feel.
This song has heart felt words. Honestly, i have grown to love this song as i have gotten older. The melody is simple but its beauty is in the words: "The only thing that makes sense in this life, i'll spend the rest of my days, just loving you"
I believe that simple words express true feelings better than dictionary needing words. Enjoy!
*Let me know if you would like this song*
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Its got me thinking...well sort of. Wondering what the point of life is. I wake up in the morning and come to work. Then i go home. And on and on it goes. Throw in a little tv watching, some socializing, a few dates, some fights and disagreements. But that;s the extent of it all. Then you die. How depressing.
I wish i had all the money in the world. And a personal financial advisor. I am tired of worrying about what goes into the savings account, what goes into the current account, how much to leave in the payroll account, how much to invest this month, how much goes into the car fund, wanting to buy new shoes, pay for plastic surgery, give to the charities....Aagh. It would just be easier to have unlimited funds and be able to spend the money on whatever i want. That way my brain can concentrate on more important things like....Well other stuff.
What did my doctor mean a few months ago when i fell ill and had to see him? He said something along the lines of thing happening to one's body since one was at the peak of her childbearing years. What does he mean? On this subject, does one have a certain amount of eggs for a life time. So if a couple dont get fertilized before the supply is up, no babies for you?
I love travel. I would love to vist as many countries as possible in my lifetime. But lately other than my recurring India fantasy, I really see myself at a resort in Seychelles. What is it about Seychelles that gets me excited? I have seen pictures but i dont know a single person who has ever been. It seems like it would be a lot of fun. I actually myself going on this vacation with a special person because it reeks of romance and sexiness. Walking down a beach in a sarong and barefeet. Holding hands. Stopping to watch the sunset as he holds me from behind and tells me this is where he is meant to be. I blame this on this damn Silhouette romance book i am reading. The first in about 2 years. Those books should be banned.
When did i get so tough? I used to be soft and mushy and pity everyone's plight. Now i find myself thinking "they deserve it" or able to rationalize and justify certain things - like the death penalty.
Why are these clients so difficult? They started out nice enough. Now it seems that have morphed into Chucky and his bride. Mean, Mean people that make me want to scream and cry at the same time. Difficult.
I guess i should try to get some work done. I have been staring at the same page for 30 minutes and have no idea what the words are, let alone what they mean. Can i go home and curl into a ball and just sleep?
OOOH a nigerian song today:
Psquare - Temptation
Yes oh! No shaking! Wetin dey happen!
Okay, i will stop now. I was trying to pull out all the nigerian slangs i could think of. I dont really think its working with me. But hey i tried. Back to the music at hand - I love Psquare and this last cd, so hot. Its got the fast songs and the ballads. Whenever i listen to the cd, i skip to this track (7), then i go to Say your love (5), then i start from the beginning. This song makes me move my body sort of like a snake. Words fail me here but i am sure you will understand what i mean as you listen to the song. I know that i will be profiling my favorite psquare songs on this blog as time goes on.
Personally, i understand all about temptation. Yup. Dont we all. I just saw the video for this song over the weekend and its alright. I could have done more with it if i was in control. Psquare - Am i the only one that thinks one of these guys looks like Usher?
Anyway, its my song for today and i am so proud of how far Nigerian music has come.
*Let me know if you would like this song*
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
I need to know something: Why is my handbag so heavy? I come to work with my laptop in its bag that is full to capacity with my diary, files, notebooks etc. I carry a flask (with my herbal tea), a mug, a book or magazine or newspaper depending on the day and my handbag. That's already a lot of stuff to be carrying from the car into the office.
Then the handbag. It used to be trendy to carry cute little bags at some point, but as i have gotten older and become a working woman, i have progressed to serious bags. You know - bigger, leather classy items. I pack each bag with care and carry only the essentials. So why on earth is it so heavy, bulky and sometimes will not close? And i am not alone. I look around me and every lady's bag here is big and bulging.
I have decided to open my bag this morning and figure out why it looks nothing like it did in the picture in the magazine when i bought it- this one is all lumpy and struggling to zip shut. I am hoping that this exercise will reveal what i need to leave home to ensure a lightening of the load (its hell on my shoulder blades) and to let the poor bag revert to its original beauty.
1. Cellphone (essential)
2. Wallet/Billfold (hmmm. This is quite bulky and not with money. An investigation reveals that i have some cash, passport pictures, bank cards and aha i have found the culprit. Business cards. Every time i meet anyone and get their card, i shove it into my wallet. So i am freeing the wallet of the business cards which will be promptly moved to my rolodex)
3. Vitamin box - essential. Contains the many vitamins i pop daily to keep my insides healthy.
4. Hand lotion - Victoria's Secret "Decadent Desire" - essential. Nothing like ashy hands. Can't stand that even with men so all admirers take note.
5. Perfume - Carolian Herrera "Chic" - essential. I carry whatever perfume i wear that day around for mid afternoon touch ups.
6. Makeup purse - essential. Even though i hardly wear make up, you never know when i might need to powder my nose or apply some lipgloss. U really never know.
7. Checkbook - essential. You never know when i might need to make a payment even though i have debit cards and cash. Still...you never know
8. Business card holder - essential. This contains MY cards for passng out. Case is nice and silver for maximum posing effect
9. Id Tag - essential. I need this. Better in my bag than around my neck messing with my ensemble.
10. 2 CDs - one blank and Dave Koz (the dance). Don't know why these are in here but i must need them for something or they wouldnt be in here.
11. Chewing gum - essential. Paranoid about less than fresh breath. So lots of minty gum is chewed through out the day.
12. Notebook - essential. For my to-do and to-buy lists. I love lists. I make lists all the time. Sometimes i even list the order of my thoughts. I am a list junkie.
13. Tail Comb - essential for those stray hairs that dont want to play with the rest of the family.
14. 3 pens and 2 pencils - essential. You bring out a pen, someone takes it. if i had only one, i would be penless. And the pencils - well they are disney pencils and are sooooo cute and i might need to write a clandestine message that will need to be erased.
15. Eyeshadow trio - Hmm...why isn't this in the makeup purse. Oh..because that purse is barely closing. Oh now i remember, i read somewhere that a quick makeup fix is to swipe some gold eyeshadow to brighten the eyes and make you look perky even though it might be 8pm. Yup - essential
16. Mints - essential. See notes on chewing gum
17. Handkerchief - essential.
18. Tissues - essential.
19. Feminine product - essential. You never know when D LADY decides to make an early arrival.
20. Some lint and stuff. - Dealing with that right now.
So why on earth is this bag sooooo heavy?
The crooner of today's song, defined what a sexy voice should sound like. A voice sooooo deep that hearing it alone made me wonder what kind of vocal chords he had:
Barry White - My first, My last, My everything
I love this song and its one of my favorite Barry White songs. I believe this song made quite a number of appearances on The Ally McBeal show. Remember that?
Its fast, its groovy, its sweet, its a little sexy and its very much Barry. Enjoy!
*Let me know if you would like this song*
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
I have always been one of those odd women that found even gifts difficult to accept. Letter and cards, i loved. Mixed tapes and CDs....Perfume - oh yeah. As i got older, i relaxed a bit. Allowed myself to accept thoughtful gifts in my mind. Shoes, books, DVDs, CDs, the odd piece of jewelery. Those were fine in my mind because it meant that he thought about who i am and acted accordingly. I remember the first time a boyfriend gave me $300 in cash to go shopping. I almost fainted. We had the biggest fight in history and resulted in me storming out and absolutely refusing to speak to him for weeks. How dare he i thought? Trying to buy me. Paying me for services rendered? That's the way it felt to me. Paying me. So subsequent men in my life know that cash is a no go area for me.
I know that a lot of my friends have always thought me odd. And those acquaintances i know think it even odder. I have been asked why on earth i am with a man if i dont get perks? Huh? How about for company, to share my time with, because i like him, because i like how he makes me feel? That seems all well and good to some while some women have looked at me in amazement. In a world where the eligibility of a man is based on the size of his wallet, car and job.
Nigeria seems to be worse. Its actually nauseating. I have a friend of mine that works with an oil company but when he meets a woman, he claims to work for a Nigerian airline. Why? To gauge the level of interest. So far, the moment he mentions Chachangi, the look on their faces change. He is a pretty hot guy, well spoken and very put together. Its interesting to see the change: from first appreciating his looks, to being turned off the moment he says where he works. I thought he was being a bit harsh at first but i have to agree with his strategy now.
So is accepting money and allowing a man foot all bills acceptable in relationships? If it is, then how much is acceptable? Does marriage make it different? How much cash is acceptable? What kind of gifts are acceptable? And this goes both ways - for men and women.
My song of the day is truly african. In every sense of the word:
Mbongeni Ngema - Lizobuya.
This song is on the soundtrack of the movie Sarafina. Remember that movie? For those that havent seen it, its about a group of south african youth dealing with apartheid. The high points of their lives occur in school particularly the class taught by Whoopi Goldberg. These kids sing and talk about the issues they are dealing with at home. We see that their teacher keeps guns at home, Sarafina has a loving mom...The details are bit hazy in my mind since its been a while since i saw it but i know i like the movie a lot and it gave a more human view of apartheid that CNN and other media outlets couldnt.
The song is beautiful in my mind. Its sung in Afrikaans and the instrumentals on it are powerful. Try listening to this song with your eyes closed. Try to forget everything around you and simply lose yourself in this song. It does what good music is supposed to do. It touches the soul, transcends language and is almost outer-worldly. Well for me anyway. Enjoy!
*Let me know if you would like this song*
Monday, November 06, 2006
There is a song from the 70's that i love by the Starland Vocal Band called "Afternoon Delight". It won a grammy way back then i believe. Now, this is one of the songs that has my knowledge of its lyrics limited to "ooooh after noon delight. Affffternoon delight". I run around the place obsessed with this song and singing just that part. Even better, the live performance of this song is so cute. This band looks like the Osmonds, all cute and folksy holding tambourines. What a sweet song.
So today, i am listening to the song at work after discovering it in my playlist and shaking my head, feet, fingers and smiling. My colleague at work asks me what i am listening to and i tell him. He doesnt recognise the song so he asks me to sing the chorus. I happily oblige. He immediately begins to laugh out loud. Calls me freaky for listening to such a hot song at work.
I am incensed. That is an innocent song. How dare he? He cannot believe i am soooo naive. Of course i argue and argue so we decide to google it. Here are the lyrics to that song:
Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight/Gonna grab some afternoon delight/My motto's always been; when it's right, it's right/Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night/When everything's a little clearer in the light of day/And you know the night is always gonna be there any way/Sky rockets in flight/ Afternoon delight/ Afternoon delight/Thinkin' of you is workin' up my appetite/Looking forward to a little afternoon delight/Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ignite/And the thought of rubbin' you is getting so exciting/Sky rockets in flight/ Afternoon delight/ Afternoon delight/Started out this morning feeling so polite/I always thought a fish could not be caught who wouldn't bite/But you've got some bait a waitin' and I think I might try nibbling/A little afternoon delight/Sky rockets in flight/ Afternoon delight/ Afternoon delight/Please be waiting for me baby when I come around/We could make a lot of lovin' be'fore the sun goes down/Sky rockets in flight/ Afternoon delight/ Afternoon delight/
No way. Not my innocent "Afternoon Delight" song. Its a freaky dicky song. These innocent looking people were probably having orgies all the time. How could i have been sooo slow? It was the 70's afterall. All hippies and free love and kumbayas around a fire with the VW camper in the background. What in the world? I feel a little betrayed and my colleague is cackling himself to death. He cannot believe i didnt know this.
I am listening to the song again as i write this and i cannot believe i never actually LISTENED to the words. "I always thought a fish could not be caught who wouldn't bite but you've got some bait awaiting and i think i might try nibbling"? What in the world?
*Let me know if you would like this song*