Friday, October 06, 2006
People are bound by many things. To outsiders looking in, the subject of imprisonment can seem mundane but to whom the shackles bind, torture itself. It can be alcohol, sex, lies, abuse, or even something as silly to some as shopping.
For me, i am bound by a number of things but this blog is about gaining my freedom from one of them. I found myself imprisoned by a person. Interesting. How it all began? I dont remember exactly but i woke up one day and realised that i was living and breathing this person. My life wasnt complete without an aspect of this person in it. I realised it was a problem when i almost stopped breathing at the thought of this person sharing confidences with anyone else.
My vacation came at exactly the right time. The time away allowed me to breathe and voila...I got back and came in contact with this person and nothing. I felt nothing untoward. Just a feeling of freedom. Even talk of other people sharing time and confidences meant nothing.
How did i get here? I think its simple really...I just made the decision to release and let this person go. You know when your mind tells you that something is unhealthy and not good for you? I listened to my head and rationalised and weighed pros and cons. And the time away helped as well.
And here i am. Free. Free to breathe and investigate sharing myself with others. Free. I am so at peace with this that i honestly believe that when the time comes for me to confront this person, i will be fine.
Freedom, Liberation...its all good. All i know at this moment, while typing these words, is that i feel good, light, smiling to myself and my heart is free to investigate possibilities....
I am free........