Taking a mini break

I am working on a project that is taking all of me and then some. So i shall earn my paycheck by focusing on this full time especially over the next few days. I think i will be able to do a post next week and considering i love to blog and used to post everyday, this is huge. Anyway till next week or soo.....

Have a fab weekend.....

Help Needed!

I need help badly. My daily schedule looks something like this: Wake up at 5am to head out of my house for 5.50 - 6am. Get back home anywhere from 10pm - 10.15pm. Saturdays involve catching some rest but bustling about to get errands done - hair, drycleaning etc. Then the social thing - and that's if i dont have to stop at the office. Sundays - church, some socializing but i try to rest as much as possible.

With that background in mind, a few months ago, i shared my weight struggles here. HOW DO I GET A WORKOUT/EXERCISE INTO MY LIFE. I workout on saturdays and sundays but honestly, for a past month, i have been too tired to do squat. I am just so tired all the time. Sometimes, getting out of bed is a struggle, the sight of the free weights in my room almost has me in tears.

Does anyone have any suggestions on exercises/workouts i can do during the week? A quick but effective workout - 20-30 minutes or even less that i can do at the end of the day? I have free weights and i am going to get a new set this weekend. I am also going to invest in an exercise ball this weekend as well. I just need ideas.

Soundbyte!

Bone, Thugs n Harmony - Crossroads

Oh this song! Love it....I actually like this group quite a lot and have liked them since i was doing my A-Levels and my brother played a tape filled with only their stuff over and over and over again.

What is it about this song that is so special? Is it the message about death and the afterlife? Is it the style of delivery? Could it be the video?

Who cares. I remember seeing this being performed at the grammys and i believe they won a grammy for this song that year and being thoroughly blown away. The names of the members of this group were so cool and i know there is a really cute light skinned one with big hair that looks so soft. Layzie Bone is the only member of the group still somewhat active. One of them is in jail. And i think 1 died?

Anyway, Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave an email address in the comments section*

Oh Glory!

Despite all the haters and nay-sayers, my fabulous Red Devils have game 1. I heard so much crap in the office. Man U cant beat AC Milan. Ha!

Glory, Glory, Glory!

For someone special......

In my soundbyte post, i mentioned my friend Miss Y and so many memories came rushing into my head and my heart just did so much and i just have to talk about this woman. By the way, the picture of Betty Boop on this post is really appropriate for her as she is a diva.

I met Y during A-Levels. I remember walking into class and sitting in the fron row where she was sitting. I was of course so quiet but we clicked almost immediately. We were the 2 youngest people in the whole set and we tried not to advertise that fact. I remember always adding a year on to my age - i was 14 at the time and i just stopped that a few years ago.

Anyway, we started talking and turns out she had just moved to my estate and we were literally 5 minutes away from each other. The start of a relationship that goes beyond the 2 of us. Our families are friends and for all intents and purposes Miss Y is my parents child and i am the extra child her parents never gave birth to.

Where do i start? We got into so much trouble together, using each other as alibis. We went out together, cooked and ate together, went on cereal diets together, shopped at MOne supermarket together, listened to music together, read each other's diaries....We talked about absolutely everything and we bacame part of a sentence - Uzo & Y.

Then about a year and a half after we met, i was getting ready to start university, she went on summer holidays and i just knew she wasnt coming back. When i went to her house on the day she was supposed to be back, her mom told me she wasnt coming back, that she was starting school in the US, i just started to cry. Her mom hugged me and told me it would be okay and proceeded to give me a really long letter which she wrote to me, i remember 2 pairs of shoes and some jewelery. I devoured the letter and it was full of the new facts of her life and i just felt so lost.

I went off to England soon after and we kept in touch. Emails and calls. Its a bit of a blur now but i know she was there. We talked a lot. My hesitant steps as i maneuvered through University of Buckingham at just 15 were shared with her. An important fact here, my boyfriend and 1 hooked her up with a close friend of his and that relationship would be a defining part of her life.

I got gifts from her and letters and i think i sent her some cds and stuff as well. Then during a holiday in the States, i flew to Virginia to see her. And it was soooo great. We talked through the night and that weekend flew by so fast.

As life began to unfold for us, we stopped talking everyday and the calls became less frequent. But our relationship was such that time didnt matter. The phone would ring and she would speak and that was it - like she was next to me and we would talk and talk and talk. Through the ups and downs, she was there.

Then i moved home and she was disappointed - we always talked about sharing an apartment or living in the same city and in my way, i tried to convince her to think about moving home as well.

We lost touch for a few months but her mom served as a bridge for us. Then we reconnected a few months ago and its almost as great as befire. I just wish i could see her everyday. I can be me with this woman. No judgement - nothing. I can say anything to her and its all good. My deepest secrets and insecurities, she has. When i am at peace, she knows. We talk fashion, men, money, life.

I am soooo excited that she will be home in a few months for a whole month. I am almost jealous of all the people she will have to see and catch up with cos i want her all to myself. There are no words to express how much i love and adore this woman. I am tearing up just thinking about her.

She is sooo beautiful - i mean physically and on the inside. She is light skinned while i am dark skinned. She is taller, i am the short one. We love shoes and that in itself can be the subject of a phone call. LOL. She is so beautiful inside with a heart of gold. She has such a wonderful job. I cant do her job cos i dont have the patience or what it takes but i love her so much for what she does. I love this woman and when i say my prayers, i might forget some people, but i never ever forget to ask my Father to bless her and her family. If i forget her family, I never forget to ask him to shower all his blessings on her. I think she knows how much i think of her but here's a public declaration.

So my divalicious Miss Y, you have my heart and i thnk God for you. Now, you know my shoe size, get shopping for your trip back and i cannot wait till you come home.

Request......

I really really enjoyed doing The Bachelor series on my blog and i am itching to do something else so i need ideas.......PLEASE?

Soundbyte!

Blessid Union of Souls - I believe

This song brings back soooo many memories from my A-Level days. All the trouble i got up to with my best friend/sister Miss Y. I think it was MTV that introduced me to this song and one of the things we did for fun in school was exchange cds. Well some guy called Fela lent me this cd and i listened to it to death. I somehow "forgot" to ever return this cd to him so 12 years on, i still have it. Does that mean i stole it or simply appropriated it? LOL.

Anyway, i never heard anything else from this band but apparently they are working on their 6th album. So if anyone has any of their newer stuff, i would love to get some to add to my library. Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave an email address in the comments section*

Its official....

Yar'Adua is the next president of the Federal Republic of Nigeria and our farmer president is giving a speech. He is also singing "Winner oh, winner". Oh my goodness..I am rolling with laughter.....

Where we are right now....

I cannot believe that after the tumult and shenanigans of the past 2 weekends - elections, annulled results, sudden public holidays etc i didnt say a thing about politics at all. Well there is nothing to say. I maintain that Obasanjo should have simply announced Yar'Adua as his successor, told people to take it or flee the country and saved us all this nonsense. Money spent, lives lost and more humiliation and embarrassment for my country. When you have an EU observer testify on television that he saw ballot stuffing with his eyes in the open, you get a sense of what happened.

Anyway, i have also come to the conclusion that its individuals and the private sector that will drive progress and growth in this country so to me, Yar'Adua can sit still. We cannot be preaching rhetoric and holier than thou speeches about Nigeria. It is what it is. All the espousing of theories from Marxism to Socialism, to what should be done but isnt being done will not change the fact that we are where we are dealing with what we face.

New attitude: I can only ask that the president Yar'Adua will just hire some half sensible people. The president will reign - at leat Yar'Adua can speak english and so will welcome international dignitaries in a half sensible manner (LOL) and the people he hires will actually lead this country.

On the issue of being a puppet. Yup. But here's the thing, by May 29th, our farmer president ceases to be important and he messed so many people up including his friends that i fear his last days will be sad indeed (whole different matter) so Yar'Adua can decide to tell him to go to hell.OL. Wouldnt that be something. The ultimate checkmate after all the maneuvering.

The results havent be announced yet but the paper state that "Yar'Adua is in a clear lead". Of course. PDP has also agreed to concede a few states. LOL....

My prayer is that once the results are announced, the aftermath is peaceful. No killing or bloodshed. its my people that suffer not the causes of the issues. Besides one of the grudges i have with Nigerians is the masses. We are 150 million strong and when we are being shafted, we just murmur and then follow like drunken sheep. Has it occured to us, that if everyone in Lagos sits at home for 3 days, we can effectively ground this country? LOL. Imagine that? Then the powers that be will be forced to discuss the issues. But all the noise about strikes is made. Then some people get up and go to work. LOL. I mean last year, how many South American regimes were toppled by the masses? What country was it, that had the president actually fleeing the country. The CNN image of the private plane taxi-ing on the runway is forever branded in my mind. LOL.

This is just a rant but the bottom line to this deluge of words is: God bless this country, guide her, protect her and set her on the right path.....Everyone say it....AMEN

Soundbyte!

Jason Weaver/Rowan Atkinson - I just cant wait to be king

Happy Monday! I am having such a great monday that i have had 4 cups of coffee so far and its only11am. Damn financial analysis.

The song for today HAS to be light - to counteract the hostile feelings about Mondays that i have. LOL. One of my favorite movies ever (and i mean this soooo seriously) is The Lion King. I still cry when Mufassa dies. I bought the deluxe soundtrack which is sooo fun since it includes songs like Hakuna Matata as well as stuff from Lebo M and other south african artistes that took part in this landmark Disney project.

Its a fun song that brings an image from the movie to my mind everytime i hear it. This is the song that plays as Simba walks along and morphs from a cub to a full fledged lion.

Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave an email address in the comments section*

On marriage and whatever my fingers tap out

I just finished reading Vickii's post and its on the age old issue of men cheating and women that stay. I was getting ready to leave a comment when i thought a post would do me good.

People that really know me would use certain words: hopeless romantic, eternal optimist, mother hen, compulsive worrier...to describe me. I have heard it said so many times that i have lost count, that my husband will be so lucky blah blah blah.

It will therefore come as a shock (not a little shock. Think atomic bomb shock) for those people to hear that there is a part of me that doesnt believe in the insitution of marriage anymore. Granted its like 10% of me. But considering that its me, that is huge.

What is marriage anyway?

There is the wedding when people get all loud and gregarious and an obscene amount of money is spent under the pretext of celebrating with you. Okay i get that part and as a part time wedding planner, i understand that people think this is a big deal.

So there are vows of fidelity right? Then there is having a family right? Taking his last name? Sharing all you have? Living with this person? Growing old together? Love? Being each other's support system? The certificate/license?

DO YOU HAVE TO BE MARRIED TO HAVE ALL THIS?

I am a christian and its no secret that i strive for spiritual guidance rather than being religious. I am very aware that the bible urges husbands to cleave to their wives and for wives to cleave to their husbands. That he who finds a wife finds a good thing. And of course the much quoted Corinthians chapter on love. And there is the issue of God sanctifying the union. I get that.

Let me be really radical and dare to say:

• The words husband/wife are man made so to me, they are just words/titles
• I believe that God is everywhere so if the person i choose to be my partner and i sit in a room in his house and say some vows to each other and pray after, shouldnt that be enough. I dont believe that a representative of God has to be present to seal a "union". I am not one of those people that live and die by the words of pastors/preachers. I believe that Church and men/women of God help to give direction, clarify and teach. But i do not believe that they have to pray for me in order for God to answer my prayers, or that i have to seek their counsel at every step of my life. I believe that as long as i can think, my lips can move i can cry out to my God and his son Jesus who he sacrificed for me, he will hear me. So what does the presence of a minister at a wedding really really do?
• I believe that a piece of paper or an elaborate ceremony does not get fidelity and commitment. I am sure we all know marriages that are just disasters.
• Why cant i and the partner of my choice decide to have kids together, live together and be a family together without getting married? Taking his last name is a matter of choice. I am old school and that would be a no-brainer for me BUT what does it matter? Taking his last name means you belong to him. The kids can have hyphenated last names. Living together can be worked out - who pays for what. In some countries, being married ensures some support if it fails but why cant both parties have their own money and have joint funds for "together" stuff? If the relationship ends, money wont be an issue. Besides, around the world, married couples hide assets from each other. Also, i know that being married and then getting divorced doesnt mean a woman will get anything. If the man is intent on being really mean, she will suffer. That's the truth.
• Relationships that lead to talks about forever after are as a result of both parties making the CHOICE to forsake all others and spend the rest of their lives together. If their hearts are true and they remain truly committed to each other, the presence or absence of a marriage certificate means nothing. If they are together and do everything together, then the association is known. The world (if that's what you care about) will know the 2 of you are together. People wont be able to put a label on you but they will know you are together
• Being married does not mean that men and women will not make moves on you in an attempt to make you break your vows. Its weakness of character that leads to infidelity. Can happen married or not
• Being married does not mean that your man wont decide to throw you out and treat you like crap and end up with another woman. Its his choice
• If you are not married and your partner cheats, if you are truly committed and in love, the choice of leaving him will be as hard as if you were married. I say this because, the ties that bind you to another person are not man made and have nothing to do with paper. Its a spiritual thing and it is complicated married or not

I could go on and on but the point i am making is that the way we treat each other: hurting each other, cheating on partners, taking hearts and breaking them, treating your lover shabbiliy, belittling them, physically or verbally abusing them have nothing to do with marriage. These are all character flaws, weaknesses that will manifest regardless of status. Some of these traits can change or alter based on your feelings for the other person.

When you are with someone, i believe you want to be better for that person, to live up to their expectiations, to be their world, the reason for their smile, their happiness....this does not change marriage or not.

I am not making a case for marriage or choosing partnership instead. I know myself well enough to say that i am up for marriage. I just dont think/see how the institution of marriage will prevent a lot of mistreatment meted out and being faced by partners.

Inspired Words

These words are inspired by the soap opera that is the life of someone i know:

I love you
No i dont
I used to love you
I never loved you
I miss you
Why are you here?
How come you dont call me?
Why do you keep calling me?
Move closer baby
Why wont you give me some space?
I feel so much for you its hard to describe
But i know i want you in my life
I feel so much for you its hard to describe
But you need to get out of my life
I want to be free and single
I dont want anyone else but you

This dance, this saga that plays out constantly with me being the observer is interesting and so so fascinating. Human behavior and human beings in general fascinate me. I dont say a thing about this cos its useless. I mean she left him and i was there. She went back to him and i was there. So now, i am just there. Is this healthy? Is this co-dependence? Is this confusion? Are they even meant to be together?

I dont get it. Is it really hard to figure out if you want to be with someone or not? In all of this, this relationship doesnt have a label. I mean, they wont see other people but they are not actually together. So what does this mean? Time keeps ticking away and now its years into this thing that is going on and still no clarity.

I guess i am different or maybe not but i know me well enough to know that i cant deal with emotional upheavals of something of this kind. I also want to know for sure. Are we a couple? No? Okay, are we working towards being a couple? The answer "I dont know" is so worrying. Let's not know apart. As soon as you know, let me know.

But as the friend on the outside, there is the urge to scream- "you silly people, get over it already". See they are both eligible and there are men and women throwing themselves at these 2 and they just are not willing to look at other people. How about i scream "make it official already"? Well they dont want to do that either.

Sometimes i find it amusing, other times, really really annoying and irritating. But hey, its not my life so i guess i shouldnt care. But when i have to listen and my opinions are sought..aggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Soundbyte!

Eddie Murphy -I want you baby

Suprise! LOL. Okay, i adore Eddie. He is funny. I have seen all his movies - loved some, hated some (what on earth was The adventures of Pluto Nash about?) and i think he is soooo cool. His personal life is interesting too but this post is about Eddie the singer.

This song is from the Dreamgirls soundtrack and i think he killed this role. It was soooo great and he really did sing those songs. This is one of my favorite songs on the soundtrack and it oozes pure soul. Just magical.

Does anyone remember the Eddie Murphy & Michael Jackson duet - Whatzupwitu? Oh boy. I loved that song....People hated it but oh my....He also did the singing thing in Coming to America, Shrek and some episodes of SNL during his stint on that show.

Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave me an email address in the comments section*

What is the point of.....

The Beyonce & Shakira song - Beautiful liar?

I dont think it has a tune, i dont get the story within the song - i dont think there is a story. I dont understand why these 2 artists with such different voices will be paired. No room for harmony, i dont think their voices are in sync...The video is interesting - i have always liked Shakira's belly dancing moves, Beyonce's moves seem forced but hey who cares right?

Why on earth am i even ranting about this song? I guess its because i heard the song for the first time without the video accompanying it and i was absolutely dismayed. I guess this also means and shows that videos have power. I am making a note of this for my foray into entertainment......

What do you guys think about the song and video?

Soundbyte!

Spandau Ballet - True

I will go out on a limb and say everyone has heard this song or some song that sampled it. I will also boldly say that i think this is the most sampled song ever.

Spandau Ballet is a british group (was a group?) that defined the funk pop sound. For all you guys that watch Eastenders, Gary Kemp used to be part of this group and his brother (Keith or Kevin - i cant remember). They are so cool.

This song was written and produced as a tribute to Motown and in particular Marvin Gaye and its ironic that it was finished about a year before he died.

Some of the songs that are as a result of this classic include:

• Fergie & Will.i.am - True
• Nelly - N dey say
• PM Dawn - Set adrift on a memory bliss
• Silkk the Shocker - U be there
• Lloyd - You
• Queen Pen & Chico Debarge - Its True

Have i missed any? Let me know if you remember any others.

The song has also appeared in 16 Candles, The Wedding Singer, Charlie's Angels, Wedding Crashers, The Office, The Simpsons...etc. What a song and what a legacy for this group.

I just adore this songso enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave an email address in the comments section*

On a lighter note.....

I spoke with a dear friend earlier today and she said my blog had been so "heavy" lately...all these words gushing. I laughed but its true. LOL. We cant have that. I mean this is the same clumsy Uzo that has all the really amazing things happen to her. Let me tell you a story that was told to me on the way home. I usually give a few people rides and this one had me laughing soooooo hard:

On a luxury bus heading from Jos to Lagos sometime last year, the passengers had the experience of a lifetime. The bus was waylaid by robbers and they proceeded to order everyone off the bus in the middle of nowhere. The passengers had their money, bags, phones and other valuables taken from them and i am sure they were scared shitless. The robbers for reasons best known to them proceeded to order everyone to strip. Not to their underwear but to total nakedness. Like Adam & Eve. The robbers then sped off leaving about 40 naked people of all shapes, sizes and complexions by the side of the road.

My imagination began to run wild and i was laughing soooo hard:

• What if a woman was at that time of the month?
• Would the men stare at the women lustfully in that situation?
• What would these people do?
• Can you imagine speeding down the high way and seeing a bunch of naked people walking/running along?
• Would you stop?
• If you were one of these people, would you stay in a pack or lag behind?
• What if your boss is driving along and stops to help, would you get into his car or would you duck into the bushes or ignore him completely?
• Would you risk running into the bushes naked?

Oh boy! My friend that told me the story swears up and down that its true and that it was even covered in the papers. Who cares? Its a great story and i am smiling now just thinking about it. I am sure it wasnt funny at the time...But its still funny.....

Soundbyte!

Celia Cruz - Guantanamera

I am a huge fan of divas and i think i have mentioned this fact before and Ms Celia is one of my favorite divas ever. She was born in Cuba but spent a lot of her life in the US. She passed away in 2003 and her funeral was unbelievable.

I 'met' Ms Celia when i was still in university and taking Spanish as an elective. Our professor always came up with fun stuff in order not to bore us since as busy law students, frivolous language electives were just a waste of time (LOL...i didnt agree). Anyway, he introduced us all to Celia Cruz in a bid to teach us dances..she was played often for the Salsa. He also used her music to point out the differences in European Spanish and Latin American/Americanized Spanish.

Anyway, i have been a fan ever since and her music just makes me happy. She has soul and flavour and seeing her performances is just unreal. Her stage costumes, hair, makeup and jewelery are yummilicious and i always wanted to raid her closet (add Whitney, Aretha Franklin, Patti Labelle, Diana Ross etc to that list) just for the heck of it. Imagine me in a Diana Ross big hair wig, a feather boa from Celia Cruz, 6 inch heels from Patti Labelle, some fab outfit from Whitney and enough ice to blind all of blogsville from Aretha Franklin....Ah...Divine.

This song may sound familiar to some since Wyclef (who i adore) featured her on his "Carnival" cd. This is a live version of the song so its soooooo emm vibrant. I just want to jump on stage and boogey on down.

Ms Celia always screamed "Azucar" on stage which is spanish for sugar so let me screammmmmmmm "enjoy this sweet song". (So So corny i know..LOL)

*If you would like this song, leave me an email address in the comments section*

Naked!

I used to enjoy being naked
Never thought twice about it
Then life began to happen
And i sought comfort beneath layers

What lies beneath the layers?
Shed some layers so i can see the real you
Arent you hot underneath these layers?
Dont you feel constrained?
Dont you want to burst free and really breathe?
Words i heard so many times over the years
Words that i heard but paid no heed to

Layers made me feel safe
Maybe i would shed a thin layer if i liked you
But no more

Then he came along
Just waltzed into my life like he belonged there
One minute he was at arms length
The next, he was almost inside me
Made me feel ever so safe
I didnt even realise that the layers were dropping to the floor
All i know is that it felt natural to be naked before him
No layers between us
Thoroughly unafraid to be hot, cold, vulnerable...
Whatever emotions i felt didnt have to be hidden
Thoroughly naked

Then it happened
The blowup when my insecurities, fears
The reason for the layers
Were thrown back at me
There i was ashamed
For he had seen my nakedness
Convinced me that i was beautiful without the layers
That naked was how i was meant to be with him
My cherished thoughts and feelings
Things revealed in my naked state
Were thrown at me with a callousness that had me reeling

No words to express the intensity of emotions i felt
But with an ever present resilience
I found my layers where they were strewn
And began to cloak myself in their safety

Now i am back behind my layers
Safe behind them
The change in me not visible to the naked eye
This time, i seem to have added even more layers
An impregnable shell
To keep me sane
To give me peace

I am sure that the layers will be shed again
As its in my nature to trust and give all of me too easily
But with every him, her, them that cause me to shed my layers
And re-arm myself
It is assured that it will get harder the next time
Which is really sad
For those that are worthy will have to work hard
To be patient, to nurture, to convince, to give space, to draw close
In a bid to get me there again
To get me to be naked

Soundbyte!

Janet Gabriel - I've heard it all before

Janet is a Nigerian based in the UK and her cd "The fire within" debuted in Nigeria last year with a lot of noise. The video for this song is what sold me on her. She isnt a teenager by any means. She is full figured, older (i assume in her mid thirties), she had a long curly weave, for some of the scenes she was in a pink dressing gown and the others, she looked like a cool rocker chick singing into a mike - nightclub style. I will admit to being very curious about her and not really listening to the song.

I of course ran out and got her cd and i will admit to being impressed. She is pretty good. Its grown folks music and definitely british styled in the sense that there is a pop thing going on to most of her songs.

Anyway, i really listened to this song and while its a common enough story, i guess because of the uniqueness of her voice, it sounds fresh. I felt her disappointment in her lover and his lies told over and over again.

I am proud she is Nigerian, i am proud of the standards, the cd liner notes (not a common thing with our local artists), professional styling of her pictures and videos...Loving her. Janet can be found here. Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave me an email address in the comments section*

My Love Affair

How many people have seen the movie Brown Sugar? I like that movie a lot - not only because its a love story but also because of the ode to hip-hop. In my case, it would be to music in general. I think in music, i see music, i relate situations to songs..I live and breathe music.

This is not an exaggeration. I am obsessed with music. I love music with the passion that i am sure some feel for a lover. I have been discovering new music lately and i feel this incredible urge to share some and there are some artists/songs that i guard jealously. Not wanting to share them for i feel they are mine.

Music has made me new friends and caused me to part ways with otherws. Moments and memories in my life are tied to songs which make me crave some songs and be absolutely repelled by others.

I sense that slowly, my blog will become more musically inclined than anything else but here's a secret - if you know me and can get past the obvious, then a simple soundbyte post can shed light on my state of mind, what i am thinking, where my head is.......

Soundbyte!

Kaysha - One Love

Let me introduce you one of my favorite african artistes. Kaysha was origianlly born in Congo but has spent a lot of his life in France. I think his real name is Edward. Anyway, i have to thank Channel O for introducing me to his music. I remember seeing the video for his song "Bounce Baby" and i became an instant fan. Hos latest effort - the cd "African Bohemian" is my favorite and this song is from this cd.

This song is simple but so beautiful and i play it way toooooo much. My favorite part of this song "Your my ebony, my ivory, my piano keys"...Dont know why but its sooooo sweet. Anyway it also doesnt hurt that Kaysha is easy on the eyes. Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave me an email address in the comments section*

Women's Issue - Self Immolation in Afghanistan

KABUL, Afghanistan - One woman committed suicide by setting herself ablaze after her father-in-law tried to rape her. Another set herself on fire because her brothers would not let her marry, preferring that she remain their servant at home. Yet another told her mother before she died that her husband beat her daily.

Testimony gathered by the Afghan Independent Human Rights Commission documents how life for many Afghan women remains so bleak that some choose a horrific and painful death instead.

The group interviewed about 800 Afghans whose sisters, daughters and daughters-in-law have killed themselves by self-immolation to escape domestic abuse, forced marriage and other misogynistic social customs.

The report and anecdotal evidence from other rights workers suggests the phenomenon is growing, with desperate women sometimes mimicking what they have seen reported on TV.

"It's really a big problem in

Afghanistan," said Nabila Wafiq, who has researched the issue for the aid group Medica Mondiale, which has interviewed women who survived their self-immolation attempts.

"When we asked most people why they committed self-immolation, they said that when they take pills, they don't die, but when they commit self-immolation they believe they will die, 100 percent."

Reports from Herat, in western Afghanistan, show about 90 women set fire to themselves last year there and more than 70 percent died. Afghanistan's poor health system can do little for the badly burned.

The commission report, released last week, covers Badghis, Herat, Farah, Nimroz and Kandahar, provinces that media and other reports suggest are the worst affected. However, women's rights advocates suspect that self-immolation is a nationwide problem.

The study indicates a marked increase in reported cases in two of the provinces. Two years ago in Farah province, there were 15 cases of self-immolation reported. That figure had jumped to 36 in the first six months of last year, the commission found. Kandahar province had 74 cases two years ago, and 77 cases in the first six months of this past year.

The statistics were recorded according to Afghanistan's calendar year, 1385, which ends March 20.

Of the other three provinces, Herat and Badghis showed a slight upward trend, and Nimroz a slight decline.

"These figures are shocking and indicative of the much wider problem of violence against women, the effects of which are far-reaching," said Caroline Hames, gender and politics specialist at the U.N. Development Fund for Women (UNIFEM). "Self-immolation is just one of the consequences of such violence, which is a daily reality for so many women in Afghanistan."

Despite advances in women's rights since the fall in 2001 of the Taliban regime that barred education and employment for females, UNIFEM estimates that at least one out of three Afghan women has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused. The abuser is usually a family member or someone she knows. Rarely is anyone prosecuted or even reprimanded.

Hussein Hasrat, a researcher who worked on the commission's report, said the data suggested a jump in the number of women committing suicide by fire. However, he acknowledged it was possible that the recorded increase was a result of better data.

Reliable nationwide statistics are not available. Many families cover up what happened because of shame, while a lack of medical care and government services mean many such cases are never officially recorded.

Wafiq said that Medica Mondiale has definitely seen more self-immolation cases. Often, she said, women mimic what they learn from news reports, which fail to point out that those who survive are scarred and deformed.

Fourteen pages of the commission's report are dedicated to brief descriptions by family members of reasons these women committed suicide. Most are because of rape, beatings and accusations against their honor. None of the dead women or their relatives are named in the report.

The mother of a victim in Badghis is quoted saying that her daughter committed self-immolation because her fiance accused her of getting pregnant by another man and would not accept the child as his own.

The mother of another victim said that her daughter was actually a victim of domestic violence although it was portrayed by others as a suicide.

"They beat my daughter a lot, then they poured fuel on her and said that she committed self-immolation," the mother says. She did not give details of the attackers.

News from South Africa

JOHANNESBURG, South Africa (Reuters) -- AIDS-hit South Africa is running short of cemetery space and residents of its main city, Johannesburg, need to consider "nontraditional" burials, including cremation, Mayor Amos Masondo said on Wednesday.

Masondo said 24 of the city's 35 cemeteries were already at full capacity and, although enough spaces remain for the foreseeable future, other options must now be considered.

"The city would like to make an appeal to residents to consider amongst other options, stack burials and cremations," the SAPA news agency quoted Masondo as saying at the opening of a new cemetery on the outskirts of the city.

South African officials have repeatedly warned in recent years of a looming shortage of burial plots, attributed in part to rapid urbanization and a cultural reluctance among African families to consider options such as cremation.

Masondo suggested that families could begin to double up with "stack burials" at existing, family-held gravesites.

Masondo did not explicitly mention South Africa's HIV/AIDS crisis, which infects about one in nine of the country's adults, but analysts say the epidemic is directly to blame for rising mortality rates in the country.

Masondo urged Johannesburg residents to respect existing graveyards and not to take them over for ramshackle temporary housing.

"Respecting those who are no more can add so much meaning to the land of the living," he said.

On Gerard Butler / King Leonidas / 300

I LOVE THIS MAN & 300 but just because i can, i wish to tell you about this man - he's smart people - i just lifted this off Wikipedia

Born in Glasgow, Scotland to Margaret and Edward Butler, who are of Irish descent. Gerard is the youngest of three children. He spent the first few years of his life in Montreal, Canada before returning to Paisley, Scotland after his parents' separation. He grew up with his mother, who remarried a few years later. He had no contact with his father until age 16. Butler studied law at Glasgow University, where he received top grades and served as President of the school's Law Society and worked as a trainee solicitor after graduation.

Career
His first acting roles were in the stage plays Coriolanus and in Trainspotting, after which he landed his first film role in Mrs. Brown (1997). While filming the movie in Scotland with Dame Judi Dench and Billy Connolly, he was enjoying a picnic with his mother near the River Tay when they heard the shouts of a young boy who had been swimming with a friend who was in trouble. Butler jumped into the river and consequently saved the young boy from drowning. He received a "Certificate of Bravery" from the Royal Humane Society.

That same year he appeared in Tomorrow Never Dies, with his first major role being the title character in Dracula 2000 (2000). His breakthrough role came when he played the title role of Attila in the United States television serial Attila (2001). The movie Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life (2003) in which Butler starred opposite Angelina Jolie was the one that put him on the map. He also appeared in the United Kingdom television serial The Jury.

He began taking formal singing lessons before he was even cast for the title role in Joel Schumacher's film rendition of Andrew Lloyd Webber's The Phantom of the Opera, training for hours a day from January 2003 to June 2004. He became very close to his co-star Emmy Rossum, whom he sees as a little sister.

In 2005 he was featured in the release of Beowulf & Grendel in Canada, followed by the U.S. and other countries.

Butler plays the Spartan King Leonidas in 300, an adaptation of the Frank Miller graphic novel (also called 300) based on the heroism of 300 elite Spartan warriors at the ancient Battle of Thermopylae in Greece. Filming took place from October 2005 - January 2006 in Montreal. "300" was released in theaters and in IMAX, in the US on March 9, 2007. Despite mixed reviews, the movie made box-office history for the month of March.

He has confirmed he is in talks to film a remake of Escape from New York where he will star in the Kurt Russell role of Snake.

What do i write about?

Would you believe that the same Uzo that was obsessive about blogging cant find the time to write. Okay so i wont exactly blame time. Its more that i have so much going on but cant put the words down for fear of revealing way tooo much.

I will say that some pretty interesting things have been happening to me - some good, some not so good and some i am not sure what category to put them in. This has resulted in mad shopping sprees including the purchase of the sexy pair of pumps that i am wearing right now. I strutted into my meeting feeling like a million bucks. Ran up and down the stairs and i was fine. Its like 12.40pm now and the toes pinch a bit. Ah, the hazards of being cute. So i have discreetly slipped my shoes off under my table. LOL....I dont care. I can deal with pain. Wish i could take a picture but my excuse for a camera has given up the ghost and that procrastination has caught up with me. I could take a picture with my phone but i dont really know how to work this funky phone. LOL

My friend Daddy's Girl has made me so proud at work and of course all the haters are doing their thing but i say, show them to me let me pull a "300" on them....A little inside joke for those that have seen the movie.

Please go and see that movie. I have seen it 3 times and would see it again in a heartbeat. Gerald Butler. I mean sure the movie is beautifully shot, and the action sequences are cool, and its a great story of bravery and courage but let's get down to the koko - Gerald Butler as King Leonidas is perfection. Standing tall at over 6 ft, with the wavy jet black hair, body to die for (who knew thigh muscles could be so sexy), a beard thing, strenght, his voice, his ability to be so gentle with wifey but smite a man with one strike...I could go on and on but i wont. And let's not forget the rest of the 300 - his soldiers. Ah Ah. Any guesses on the object of my latest fantasies, screensaver and wallpaper?

So i am rambling and i will confess that i went out of my way to do a "proper post" cos Bella Naija ordered me to.

Oh.....i got a marriage proposal. LOL...Well i have been asked over and over by this man. But get this - I get to be wife number 2. Isnt that just such a treat? I mean what else could i want in my life.....

Soundbyte!

Betty Wright - No Pain, No Gain

Let me school you guys on one of the greatest vocalists in my book. Ms Wright is one heck of a storyteller with her songs as well. I bet you guys have heard her without knowing it. One of her hits - Clean up woman has been sampled by some popular atists: Its guitar riffs were used in a remix of Mary j Blige's "Real Love", sampled by SWV in "I'm so into you" and even influenced Africa Bambaataa among others. She is a grammy winner, business woman (becoming the first woman to have a gold record on her own label).

I fell in love with this woman cos my dad and mom loved and used to play "Tonight's the night" over and over again. My dad still plays this song very loud on some sundays and my mom sings along. Yummy.

Anyway, i realised that someone i consider my kindred spirit sent me this song and even though i already had this song, her value went up many many points in my book. To appreciate Ms Wright is to appreciate music.

The words to this song are cute. I love it. The difference between real relationships and infatuation. What real women should do - being a lady but a freak. The difference between the "young" ones and real women....

I might just do a Betty Wright theme for a whole week....Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave me an email address in the comments section*

Soundbyte!

Des'ree - Life

Oh my! I had a truly rested weekend and its back to work with full force. I just got a chance to do this since i have been tied up all day.

This song brings back so many memories from my college days in england. My friend and flat mate - Ms H loved Des'ree and would play this song over and over and over again. While i liked this song, i will say she truly made me love it. Imagine a little lady - about 5 feet tall and really petite grooving to this song and she could dance too. I miss those days.

Anyway, Des'ree is a truly gifted vocalist and there are a few of her songs that i prefer to this that i am sure will become soundbytes at some point. I chose this song for today 'cos its upbeat and cute and just so great for today. Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave me an email address in the comments section. I owe people some songs which i will try to get out today so check your inboxes*

Soundbyte!

I could sing of your love forever

As we prepare to take time off work and school for the Easter holidays, let us try to remember the reason why we have this time off. We live in a world of political correctness gone too far, trivializing of holidays, chocolate Jesus' on display in hotels...its endless.

Now i am not going to preach 'cos its not my style. I only ask that you take the time to thank God for his mercies, for the sacrifice of his son and just for the privilege of being alive. If you are not christian, i ask that you be tolerant and considerate of your brothers and sisters during this period. For the atheists among us, this is not the the time to question beliefs and belittle people's faith.

Happy Easter everyone!

*If you would like this song, leave me an email address in the comments section*

........

Hey you
You know i mean you my special one
Let me whisper in your ear
Dancing around with words
Come here
Let me whisper in your ear
Just between us
I like you

Hee Haa!

Hee Haa
What i feel like screaming
Like one of those cowgirls from westerns of old
I roped you in

Hee Haa
Bet you thought it wouldnt happen
You put up a good fight
You ran from me
Evaded me
Blew me off

Hee Haa
Strutted my stuff
Shook my bon bons
Flicked my hair
Licked my lips
And you began to really see me

Hee Haa
I won
Swore i would make you want me
Wanted to make you beg for a touch from these magic fingers
To crave me
To want me with a hunger that almost drove you to insanity

Hee Haa
Blowing up my phone
Asking for 5 minutes of my time
Promising heaven and hell
Just to be with me

Hee Haa
Pity i dont want you anymore
Think it was all in the chase
Maybe 'cos you dared resist
Maybe i am just a tease
Who cares?

Hee Haa
I've till got it
Still a smoking gun
I've still got it

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeee Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Soundbyte!

Snow - Informer

I was organizing my music and stumbled on this song. Oh my! It brought back so many memories. I could not for the life of me figure out what this man was saying. When i saw the video, i didnt get it. I mean this nerdy man with glasses and a denim shirt put this song out? Enjoy!

*If you would like this song, leave me an email address in the comments section*

...................

Its a little after midnight
And i am in a meadow
With carpets of green grass underneath my bare feet
And the smell of flowers i cant name in the air

In this place
At this moment
I feel no fear
Nor am i worrying about safety
Its just me
Walking in my bare feet and humming to myself

Where i am going, i dont know
I just know i need to keep walking
Slowly but with steady steps
I am walking

And in this place
I am happy
Deliriously happy
I feel a lightness in my spirit
And i am all smiles
Walking by myself in this meadow

Its dark but light at the same time
Must be the moonlight
Because i can see the outlines of trees
And birds
But i am not afraid

I bend and pluck a handful of grass
To smell that earthiness
And i notice i have plucked some wild flowers as well
I clean up the wild flowers and stick them in my hair
So happy
Humming
Then i hear a rippling sound
Like water

I am even more excited now
With flowers in my hair
And my bare feet
I begin to skip towards towards that sound

I push through some branches and there it is
A small stream
Small but so beautiful
I cant help sitting down and dangling my feet in the stream
The water feels so cool and it looks so clear
I dip my hand into the stream
It feels so cool
I cup my palm and bring it to my lips
The water is sweet
And i feel it is good for me

I look around me
And i notice that this meadow reaches for miles and miles around
I need to get up and explore
So up i get
And turn left to see what's on this side

And then i see a woman
She is sitting under a tree
She seems to be crying
What's the matter i ask as i approach
She looks up and i stop
For it is me
But she looks so sad
I rush to myself to hold me in my arms
What's wrong beautiful uzo?
She says: I hurt but i dont know why
I ask uzo - did u stub your toe or run into a tree
Oh Uzo she says to me
Its not a physical pain
Uzo grabs my hand and presses it against her heart
The hurt is in here she says
I stare at her
At me
And i reach out and touch my cheeks
Dont cry uzo
But tell me why you hurt
She says to me - its everything
And in that instance
I know what ails her
I pull me into my arms and whisper to her
It is alright my dear
It shall be well

I reluctantly turn around
For i still want to see more of this meadow
Suddenly i feel the earth begin to tremble
An earthquake in the meadow?
But how?
I turn to find some cover underneath some branches
And then i notice the sounds are coming some something coming my way
I stand paralysed with fear
When i see this horrible creature
Must be 7 feet high
With such grotesque features
And a body infested with boils

It makes a blood curdling sound
I stare at the creature
Stare at its facial features
It is Uzo
But how?
It says: Move little one
I whisper Uzo?
How do you know my name?
Look at me - can you say you do not know me
It stares closely
I used to look like you it says
Before i let all my anger consume me
But what made you so angry to make you almost unrecognizable to me?
It stares at me
And in that instance
I know what and why it is angry
It has been angry for years
I cant think of touching this other Uzo
But i am moved to tell it
There is a stream not too far from here
Immerse yourself in it
It will help

I am not sure if i want to be in this meadow anymore
But how do i get out
I turn in the direction i think i have not gone
I see some light
Not moonlight
But a golden glow
I run towards the light
But i stop short
I see an older woman
Surrounded by people
As i get closer
I realise that it is me again
An older me
Who are all these people i ask her
This older serene beautiful Uzo looks at me
I remember you from many years ago
She says - Let me introduce you to your family
She turns to the older man by her side
This is your soul mate - the one God created for you
We got married and had these 2 - she points to a handsome young man and beautiful softspoken woman
They got married to these 2 - she points them out to me
And they have given us 4 grandbabies
We live in this beautiful home
Soul mate has accomplished...
And i dont work anymore except for my causes
I am speechless
But.....
No Buts she says
Listen to me
I begin to tear up
Older Uzo says to me
Hold on, my young self
Your pain, your hurt, your anger, your trials, your tribulations
Your successes, your pride, your loves, your losses, your angst
Everything you feel right now
At this point in your life
Your encounters with the other Uzos
Will lead up to this moment
Maybe not this exact scenario
But a moment of your own making
Where you will find the peace and happiness you seek

I want to stay with her i tell her
She smiles to me
If i let you stay with us
Things will change
For i fear you are not ready to be where we are
But it will come
Turn around she tells me
Find your way
She says to me
The meadow is empty for a reason
It only has Uzos in it for a reason
Your life is your own only
People will come and go
But your life is your own
She pulls me into her arms
And her family hugs me too
See you soon she says

I turn around and walk away
I am back to the moonlit meadow
But i am different

It is a little after midnight
And i am sitting beside a stream
With flowers in my hair
And barefeet
And i am truly happy