Friday, June 29, 2007

Women's Issue - Body Image & Eating Disorders


I have had this article for about a year and i had to find it to send it to a young lady in my life who i think will be interested in reading this. Its an old article (from the American perspective) but very simply written. Do you agree with the views expressed?
You don't have to go very far to notice that the ideal for women's bodies at present is a thin, fit, radiantly healthy, young, white woman. Just open a magazine, an advertising supplement to the Times, wait for a bus or subway, or merely walk down the street. The message of what we should look like is everywhere. The inescapable presence of these images shape our images of our own bodies, especially as women.

The media images we see of women offers us the "ideal." These women seem middle or upper-class by virtue of their expensive clothes, and are almost always white. Women seen outside the home are typically "attractive" and occupy jobs where they never seem to have to work. There are hardly any pictures of African American, Asian American or Native American women in advertisements aimed at the "general" population although they may be found if advertisers wish to "target" a group in a specific "ethnic area."
The range of actual body types in the past was no different than today. What has changed is what has been set up as the ideal. Studies have shown that while 25 years ago the average model weighed 8% less than the average American woman, today's model weighs 23% below the national average. The exclusion of so many women from representation is a denial of the wide range of bodies and appearances. Instead of marveling at the assortment of body shapes, we continually compare ourselves with each other. We begin to objectify our own and other women's bodies.
Notions of the ideal body are linked with the economy. There are a wealth of businesses that depend upon the American desire for thinness to survive. In order to create a market for their product, they attempt to make women feel inadequate about our own bodies. Their product or exercise equipment will get us on the way to the "real" us, the thinner, better, more popular us. We are given the message that our value depends on our physical appearance. We are told that we must be sexually attractive to be successful and happy. An ideal weight is presented as a requirement for being sexually attractive.
Unfortunately, limits on "desirable" thinness have not been set. The popular notion is that, as long as a woman isn't "badly" anorexic, being thin is not hazardous. Our standard of normal body size has become so thin that average weight people are considered abnormal. What has actually been proven, however, is that people on both extremes of the continuum (excessively thin or over 100 pounds above the norm) have increased health risks. The majority of those who consider themselves "overweight" are not. The height-weight charts we are familiar with were developed by the Metropolitan Insurance company, by a popular notion of ideal weight instead of a basis on an appraisal of specific health risks. In the conservative "Medical world," height-weight charts are being re-evaluated, some increasing "normal" weights by 20 percent.
Real and Ideal
Our ideal of thinness is influenced by many basic American values. This country prizes things like individuality, self-help, hard work, success, and self-control. We are given the message that if we just work hard enough at dieting and exercise, anything can be accomplished. Women especially are told that their efforts in perfecting their bodies will be rewarded by success in both their professional and personal lives. If we fail at achieving the ideal, we are told we must "try harder." A fat person is seen as lazy or greedy or without self-control."Obviously," we think, she wouldn't be fat if she could just control what she ate or "if she bothered to exercise."
As women enter the "male" world of higher education and employment, we are even more pressured toward perfectionism. We must not only achieve but excel. Some 1970's feminist advice tells us to be self- sufficient; that fulfillment comes from what we provide for ourselves.
While women make a few gains toward economic independence in entering the business world
without a fundamental change in its structure, we are forced to become "Superwomen." We are expected to achieve in the competitive business world while also excelling in traditional domestic roles of "wife" and "mother." Because of this dual expectation we are faced with many contradictory messages. Different characteristics are needed for each role and not living up to the ideal in either can cause feelings of failure and self-hate. We have attempted a sort of "masculinized" female form as a tool of upward mobility, and the need to perfect our bodies has intensified the social tendency to equate women's worth with our bodies. The perfect body is our new status symbol. Weight consciousness has become part of our campaign for upward mobility.
Attempting to enter the basic American search for self-control, individuality and thinness has not, however, brought most women more health and happiness. Instead, we often feel as if we have failed and the blame is laid squarely on our shoulders. But the social requirement that we achieve the "ideal weight" is based on the presumption that we can completely control our body size. In fact, the size and shape of our bodies are as genetically determined as skin and eye color.

Monumental Soundbyte - 31


In Deep - Last Night a DJ Saved My Life
Literally. LOL. The traffic last night was staggering. And thankfully it was SS's bday so we boogied down since there was nowhere to go. My time of arrival at home last night? 12.32am....Insane.
Anyway, this song was going to be on this list anyway, i just moved its place up a bit. 1982. Can you believe that? 1982. My baby sister has never heard this song ever. LOL.
"Last night a dj saved my life from a broken heart". How on earth did he do that? I mean did she have a bad breakup and the dj played some nice songs. I love this song but i have to admit, i havent REALLY listened to it. I think i know the chorus and a few words but its the beat and the fact that is soooo danceable that does it for me.
Enjoy!

Thursday, June 28, 2007

So Proud...

In this month's edition of True Love Magazine, there is a profile on female bloggers and all our girls are in there: Adaure, Bimbylads, Aramide (Mona), Bella & of course TMinx...

I am soooooo proud of all these ladies. Everyone at work that knows about my blog kept asking if i knew these ladies and with a sense of pride, i said YES....Tminx, i am taking u out for drinks as soon as u get into town.

So proud

Encounters!

I had an encounter with an okada rider this morning and as is usual, it wasnt a pleasant experience...Today, i am fed up and sick of Lagos

Monumental Soundbyte - 30


D'Banj - Tongolo
Yes. This song is monumental. This song was our introduction to the phenomenon that is D'banj. Mr Onobanjo has not come to play. I mean, not only did he come with the music, he has also added words to the Nigerian lingo and introduced a dance step - Ya'uzi (sp).
"Do you like the koko? How sweet is the koko? Kokolets 1,2, Kokomaster ....Lol
This man is naughty and soooo fun. His songs rock. He is supported by the able Don Jazzy (whose producing skills have my attention) and lately, his opening act is a talented vocalist called Wande Cole who is something else.The remix of Tokolo is hilarious and so cool, Why Me is great, Loke is so cool...and i cant wait for some of his other songs to be released.
Seeing him perform is a treat. His mom sells fabric (lace etc) and he always integrates the most interesting things into his costumes and looks baaaaaaaaad. He isnt afraid to do the purple lace sequined thing and of course, the sunglasses. He has stage presence and his performances are unreal. During the Chante Moore / Kenny Latimore concert, he performed Anaconda which is so naughty but i like. Everyone else performed but it was only when D'Banj got on stage that Kenny & Chante got up to really watch. D'banj brought on the atilogu dancers, tiv dancers and co and just brought it. He looks good always.
At the recent Hip Hop Music Awards, he was co-host and did this skit with him being refused entry into Muson and him sneaking past security and sprinting into the hall. He did this while wearing a 3 piece suit that looked like something that Ozwald Boateng would create. Beige, fitting his slim figure just right. He made his entrance and stood at the top of the stage in this pose with those glasses and it was just mega cool.....LOL
Efizzy is this man's middle name. He has a a nice collection of cars - one of which is a BMW 5 Series with a license plate D KOKO 1. I love it.
I expect bigger things from this young man......
Enjoy!

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Take me away.........


I like to torture myself. I have been on the mailing list of this travel company since i went on a cruise with them years ago. Every other day, i get an email with some interesting deals and i simply sigh and say "Oh well". Perhaps i shall share the ones i find interesting from time to time. So i am starting with this one....(The parts of this vacation that just do it for me are in red)
Enjoy the sights and sounds of Central Europe with a scenic and unique cruise along the Danube River. Gate 1 Travel is offering a 6-night special for an outside cabin aboard the deluxe MS Bolero for only $499 per person. That's $300 OFF regular rates!

This special also includes:
All meals on board cruise, including unlimited wine and beer with dinner
English speaking tour guides and tour manager throughout
Select sightseeing tours including a visit to Nuremberg Castle, a concert in Vienna featuring works from Mozart and Strauss, a guided walking tour of medieval Regensburg, and much more
Optional tours also available

This special is valid for departures on November 15 and December 14. The cruise departing on December 14 also includes stops at Europe's popular Christmas Markets, where outdoor markets are decorated in lights and filled with music, along with baked goods, sweets, and crafts

Happy Times


Imagine the following:

You have just made it through your wedding ceremony and step out onto the church steps.

The photographer raises his camera.

Following your family tradition, both of you hold white doves which you will release together.

You and your new husband stand shoulder to shoulder with a dove in your hands as your friends and relatives eagerly wait.

The photographer gives the ready signal and you open your hands toward the sky.

Not a dry eye in the house, the camera flashes; the moment is saved for eternity....

What would you do if you were the bride or groom?

Monumental Soundbyte - 29


Donny Hathaway - A song for you
I declare that i am in the mood for sappy love songs. I also declare that whenever this mood takes over me, Donny Hathaway and Luther Vandross usually rule. Therefore, i think it is only fitting that i use this song today.
For a very long time, i thought Donny Hathaway owned this song - i mean that i thought it was originally done by him. Turns out it was written by someone called Leon Russell. However, it is Donny's delivery that is the post popular, the best sung and is just plain heavenly.
This is a song about deep yearning and Donny just brings it..."I've been so many places in my life and time, I've sung a lot of songs and i've made some bad rhymes. I've acted out my life in stages, with ten thousand people watching. ......Nd my singing this song for you"
Amazing song.
So so many people have tried to do things with this song and some have been forgetable while there are few that i really like:
  • Elliot Yamin's performance of this song on American Idol made me fall in love with this blue eyed curly haired sweetheart and made me buy his debut album which i dig
  • Ray Charles made this mellow and sweet
  • Michael Buble's version made me think of Vegas and performances by people like Tony Bennett
  • Gerald Levert brought this home for me as well

Once again, no-one did this song like Donny and this man was just chuck full of talent. Sadly he suffered from severe depression and committed suicide in the 70's (that's the official cause of death - some people have differing opinions).

Enjoy. Please press play on the thingy to hear this song.....

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

The Thinking Blogger Award!


Thanks to the fabulous Daddy's Girl, i am now the proud recipient of The Thinking Blogger Award which is such a huge compliment since i am being a goofball a lot of the time.
The way it works - a blogger picks 5 blogs that gets them thinking and those recognised blogs get the award and they in turn have to choose 5 blogs that get them thinking and on and on it goes.
So here goes:
Silent Storms in an Ocean of One: I am sure its no secret that Olawunmi is one of the people that i have known the longest - going on 14 years now. Ever since we met, he has been a teacher of sorts. I mean literally, he helped me out with some tough classes back in the day and as we have grown, that hasnt changed much even though i dont like to hear a lot of what he has to say these days. His blog is really cool and you never know what to expect on any given day. One minute he has you thinking long and hard about the state of Nigeria or the antics of Mugabe, the next its a barely coherent rant about F1 or my glorious Reds, the next he is pulling at heart strings with his words of love/yearning/desire that have many women in blogsville wishing to replace the words "her"and "she" with their names. LOL.
Aijuswanarite: A new favorite of mine. This blogger came to my attention during the Naija Bachelor series on my blog and his comments were just so amazing. I have been a fan ever since. Seeing as he was an English major, it guess its no suprise that he is something of a wordsmith. Even when he is questioning the "Naija Big Offer", i just want to laugh out loud. Its like his words are double edge swords loaded with oodles of sarcasm and humour. So cool
Soul Searching: This is a blog that grew on me. I read it every now and again and since i dont really enjoy reading poetry (I know - so hard to believe), never paid it much mind. Then Ms Soul did a post on blacks and i left a really long comment about it. She took my comment, made it a post and did a rejoinder of sorts and that was the start of that love affair. The woman behind this blog is one of the smartest and funnest people i know and she is pretty cool too. Reading her blog forces me to savour the words there. I am a speed reader so i read so quickly that there is the danger of missing the messages that lie between the lines. She has a way of making a simple post about rain seem like a decadent treat to be enjoyed in private
Life is Beautiful .....or is it?: Daddy's Girl's blog that has me checking if she has updated practically every hour. I love her vignettes and stories. Every now and again, she will whip out some poetry and have me reeling. This woman amazes me. Whenever we hang out and do our thing, i almost cant believe that she is the one behind her posts. She really is quiet and unassuming with a powerful mind. Anyway, she weaves issues from infidelity to class divides into her stories and i really like that....
Light Her Lamp: Jaycee's blog is an inspiration to me. She always has some beautiful christian/gospel music playing on her blog and a lot of her recent selections have been new to me. She takes a simple concept of everyday living and uses the Bible and the Word of God to let me know that there really is nothing, abolsutely nothing that God hasnt thought of. Weird thing about her blog as well is the fact that i feel like every post is just for me.
There are so many other blogs that lift me up, amuse me, get me thinking and just make me happy to be able to read but5 it is....

Monumental Soundbyte - 28


Biz Markie - Just a Friend
"Ooh. You've got what i need. And you say m just a friend. oh baby you"
Seriously - what is there not to love about this song? Its so funny - i mean his off key singing is hilarious. And the video for this song? Unreal. I really like this song a lot. I mean i hear it, and i just smile. Of course Mario covered this song but we all took that version a little more seriously didnt we?
The phrase "Oh Snap" originated in this song and it has become a part of pop culture as we know it..
Such a fun song - Enjoy!
*Press play on the player thingy to hear this song*

Monday, June 25, 2007

Thank You


I am so overwhelmed with all the love i got from you guys yesterday. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I guess i must be doing something right. I had a great day and i really wish everyone could have been there. I got suprises and phone calls and prayers and my heart was just sooo full. Thanks to all the bloggers that called me and sent emails - Ms D woke me up at 12.35am...Mad i tell you in a good way. I also had the pleasure of meeting a particular blogger who i think is even more fun than on blogsville...Wont say who since i am not sure the blogger would like that given the cloak of mystery that surrounds this blogger.


Well, its over now (*sob* I didnt want the day to end) and its back to real life....


Thanks again! Much love...........

Monumental Soundbyte - 27


Tere Bina - From The Guru soundtrack (putting the artist here i think will be redundant since it will mean nothing to most people except Daddy's Girl)
Seeing as its my day today, i think its so fitting that i have a song that embodies my passion - India. Anyone who knows me will attest to the fact that i was probably Indian in my former life. I love India - the country, the culture, the food, the music and of course bollywood. I wont go into a full scale rant on what i love about this country but i will say that blogging has introduced me to a beautiful young woman who shares my passion and has quickly become my friend and will be travel companion as we travel to this country later this year.
I urge you all to see this movie if you can. Its based on the life of the MD of Reliance Industries and he Gurukant is played to perfection by Abhishek Bachchan (the son of the godfather of bollywood Amitabh Bachchan). His supportive wife is played by Aiswaraya Rai (former Miss World) and they got married in real life in April.
Okay - this song is amazing. I have shared this song with practically everyone that i know. I fell in love with the song obviously when i saw the movie and i couldnt wait to get my hands on it. Well i found the song and i had to find the lyrics translated. And when i found them, they took my breath away. One of the reasons i love Indian culture is its sensuality. The smells of everything from spices to perfume tease and tantalize the senses, the saris are the sexiest outfits ever - with the hint of skin and regality, the kama sutra and song lyrics like this one are about love. Not all this nonsense on the surface stuff but love that has to be described with phrases like .......i cant even begin to go there....So here are some portions of the translated lyrics of this song and you just might understand what i mean.....
Oh my love, what's the point in living without you
Without you, the moon's golden glow is impure
Without you, gold is brass
*Enjoy. Press play on the player thing to hear this song*

Saturday, June 23, 2007

A Modern Fairytale - Part 1


Once upon a time, in a distant land called Lagoshia, there was born to Otunba Femi Judiimi and Princess Fadekemi Aeisha a beautiful baby girl called Oreoluwa Adoara Mariam.
This princess with the multi-cultural names was destined to live a charmed life. Her parents though not born into royalty had been given their chieftaincy titles by virtue of their contributions to society. Her father until his retirement was a customs officer and her mother - well she looked good all the time and attended every occassion that was guaranteed to be a splash in the very intellectual weekly publications that were sold around town.
Our little princess' arrival was met with relief by her parents - her mom ecstatic that she finally had a child and that all her visits to the many holy men/women had not been in vain and her dad could finally prove to the world that he was virile. Besides, it saved him the cost and hassle of marrying another wife.
In that vein, a gig to end all gigs was planned. The live music was provided by legendary King Sheshe Agagu, the masked one Lariga, the elegant stallion Onyinye Owe and the Koko master - Dayo. The party lasted over 4 days with lots of food and drink for all. Through all this, our princess had her cute little self enrobed and disrobed a total of 25 times. And our little princess slept through most of the proceedings.
So our little princess began her charmed life. She attended the best private schools in town. Sure she couldnt recite her ABC's properly at age 5 but her parents stepped in and she scaled through kindergarten and nursery 1 without a hitch. She couldnt count for shit but her finger paintings were great.
Our little princess also began to develop the necessary social skills for interaction with the world. All her little classmates were either royalty like her or expatriate kids from far off countries like Venezuela and China whose parents worked in the thriving agriculture sector that was a huge foreign exchange earner for Lagoshia.
Fast forward 18 years.............

Monumental Soundbyte - 26



George Michael - Faith

I love, love this song and i am also a huge George Michael fan. We share the same birthday, i think he is so hot even though he seems intent on always getting into trouble but hey - its that bad boy thing i guess.

But back to the song - LOL.

This song is off his debut album also called Faith released in 1987. Cannot believe it has been that long. Anyway, the video for this song was just tooo much for my little self. I mean - with the skinny stone wash jeans, his impeccable coif, the leather jacket, earring, guitar, tapping feet, black and white video...I need to stop.

This song did great things on the UK & US charts and started George's solo career wonderfully.

This is one song that brings out the pretend rocker in me. I sing along and pretend to strum along on my imaginary guitar and my head does this weird bopping thing as if it has a mind of its own.

Monumental song because of its commercial success, the fact that it paved the way for George Michael's solo success, the video spawned so many clones in the 80's and shucks - i just love it. Enjoy!

*Remember the press play on the player thingy to hear this song*

AAAAHHHHH!

As you can probably tell, i am a bit unsure of what to do with myself....Friends cant really visit cos everyone is watching the petrol situation....I shall be back later in the day with a soundbyte post....

Oh------- I've got the blues

My birthday is on monday and the strike might still be on then....*sobbing*. I am not sure i can take anyomore. I am off to find some life and might bow and buy some black market petrol. NLC & Govt: please find some kind of resolution.....

Oh------- I've got the blues

My birthday is on monday and the strike might still be on then....*sobbing*. I am not sure i can take anyomore. I am off to find some life and might bow and buy some black market petrol. NLC & Govt: please find some kind of resolution.....

And the atrocities begin to come out....

* Obasanjo has bought a private jet at N36 million and has flown to Jamaica. The funds came from a company called MRS set up in conjunction with Dangote and Dantata

* Donald Duke is not the saint we all thought. Cross River state is in debt up to its eyeballs, Tinapa is not complete and it is rumoured that it will take another N60 billion to complete. The American companies touted to have taken equity and space appear to be a charade. Duke also left with 4 of the official cars leaving the current governor carless and thoroughly confused. One of the banks that Duke took a loan from disclosed how much it was and it is staggering. Remember this is just from one bank. The arrangement for Cross River state's loan repayment is a direct debit arrangement with a rumoured N700 billion taken from its allocation account directly each month. Donald Duke is in the Uk at the moment and is rumoured to be one of the names on the list of potential ministers....

* Its amazing the things that are beginning to come out.......

* Let me go out on a limb and declare that the Obasanjo administration will probably be the most corrupt we have ever had*

Friday, June 22, 2007

Day 3 of the strike

Oh dear. I am tired of this strike. I know the Nigerian Labor Congress has a point and i even give them kudos for actually going through with this and making the government take notice but...Its so hot. Diesel is being rationed. I am reading and listening to music. Talking on the phone is an option. Nowhere to go since there isnt any petrol. Agggggggggggggggghhhh. Thanks to my blogger friends that have called me...He He He...

The NLC has threatened to cut off electricity and water supply if their demands are not met....Aghhhhhhhhhhh!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

My thought for the day

Mediocrity attacks Excellence